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When is the best time?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by indecisionmaking, Sep 1, 2013.

  1. So I'm at my mum's house now. I've definitely deposed to come out to her today, but I don't know when the best time is.
    See, I visit my mum with my brother and sister, and my mum has a daughter too, (my half sister) but I don't want any of them hearing. They're spend most of the time downstairs so I thought I'd ask to talk to my mum privately upstairs. I just don't know when.
    We get picked up from home at 10, and arrive at about 11. We get picked up to go home at 5.
    My sister's making tea so she'll be occupied after dinner, but I don't know how much time I should give my mum afterwards before we go home.
    I don't know when would be the best timeā€¦
    Please help?
     
  2. Nocturnal

    Nocturnal Guest

    Maybe you could write it out & slip it in her purse or anywhere she will notice ASAP, like a desk or on her bedside table?
     
  3. I sort of wanted to say it to her face to face, seeing as it's more personal.
    I'm just not sure WHEN I should say it. Whether I should give her a few hours before we go home, or say it closer to the time when we leave.
     
  4. Ohhai

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    Maybe the moment will crop up?
     
  5. RainbowMan

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    This is a bit of a tough one. It really depends on what you think the reaction will be. If you think that she'll be supportive and asking questions, then I would pull her aside ASAP in order to tell her - there's no need to wait until you're "naturally" alone with her - just say something like "Mom, there's something that I need to speak with you in private about". She'll likely give you the time and space that you need.

    On the other hand, if you think that her reaction is going to be negative, then the same strategy as above works to get to her alone, but the timing needs to change a bit to the end of the visit, just when you are getting ready to leave. That way you don't have to deal with the negativity that is sure to permeate the air.

    Good luck!
     
  6. ukbrunette

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    I agree! I think it depends on how you believe she will react.
    I hope she will be supportive, but if not then giving her some time will be best.
    Wishing you the best of luck xxx
     
  7. I did it.
    She was really supportive and hugged me a lot but I still felt really uncomfortable. I feel better though, and she told me something that she never told my brother and sister so it helped a lot.
     
  8. Feijoa

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    That's great news!

    The uncomfortable feeling will subside - that was just your anticipation and fearfulness 'escaping' if that makes sense.
     
  9. Holly

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    Congratulations! I felt uncomfortable after I told my mum too. It was just she was looking at me differently, I guess. It goes away after a while, that awkwardness :slight_smile:

    Well done to you! :grin:
     
  10. Thanks everyone :slight_smile:
    I'm glad I have people on EC who know exactly what I mean.
     
  11. rjrh20

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    Wow, congratulations! My mom kind of went into shock, but were cool now.
     
  12. Ohhai

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    Yay well done xxx