Hello, I am getting close to telling my parents that I am queer. I identify as queer or gay, but know that my parents won't really understand the word queer and I don't really want to get into a huge dialogue about language etc. If I say bisexual I feel a bit misrepresented and my mom will just think I am confused and straight and then she will desperately hold onto the idea that I will find a straight cis male and live happily ever after (which does not feel like something I really want). Lesbian does not really resonate with me either as I am attracted to genderqueer people or people who chose to not identify with one gender. My sister was saying I should just say I am not straight but that seems so vague and a bit cowardly. Has anyone used the term gay to come out with knowing that it closely represents what they want to get across about themselves? do you think straight people assume that if you say this as a cis woman that you are a lesbian? Thanks! Emily
If someone told me they were gay I'd probably assume they mean only same-sex and I've spent the last few weeks on here learning why thats wrong, so I'm guessing your parents would too! There are 2 ways to look at it though. Firstly, you could tell them you're bi. They might hope you're just confused, they might assume you're just gay. You may end up explaining to them every so often. Alternatively you could tell them you're gay and when they ask why you're dating someone who as far as they can see is a man, then you just tell them you're happy and leave it at that. Why give them more than they need or can deal with?
