Ohkay, so this is something I've been thinking A LOT about the last weeks or so and figured I might get some opinions on here about the situation. Right now I am out as Bisexual to all of my friends, my Mom, and some of my closest family members. The biggest obstacle I have to overcome is telling my younger Brother & Sister.. I really have no idea how or when I should go about it. My Brother is 8, and my Sister is 12. For what it's worth, they do no live with me. I've been living with other family for the last 4 years or so.. but our relationship is still pretty good. At first I figured I would wait til' they were somewhat older, figuring that they may be more excepting. But than it occured to me that they may start to hear things in school and from their friends, which could possibly lead to them hearing others bash gay people and as a result hate my lifestyle and possibly end up hating me. However, I started thinking a lot more about it and thought that sooner than later may be the better route, that way they can get used to the idea and not be influenced by others. I don't know, it seems like I'm kind of over preparing maybe? It's just they are the most important people in my life and I couldn't take it if they looked down on me in any way. I would love to hear everyone's opinions on the matter and as to what I should do. Help would be greatly appreciated.
On the links page ( http://emptyclosets.com/home/pages/resources/links.php ) there is a great PDF document titled What Does Gay Mean? It talks about explaining homosexuality to children and I think it would help you talk to this to your sibilings. I would definitely make sure your mom is ready for you to talk to them and share the document with her too. They are definitely old enough to understand with not too many details.
I would talk to your mum about it, and see what she thinks. I certainly think they're old enough to know - and I also think the younger, the better. You say they don't live with you - is this a step-family situation? The only reason I ask is that I don't know your circumstances, so I wouldn't want you to get into trouble with members of their family, if they would have a problem with you telling them or something. But I don't know your situation, but that is the only potential problem that comes to mind. They may also not be as discreet as other members of the family (or they may forget about it not finding it interesting even), but it sounds like you are very out so it wouldn't be a problem. But I don't see why you shouldn't come out to them - but I would discuss it with your mum first. And of course you don't have to go into details or anything - but I think most people of their ages have heard of gay people, so I don't think you'd be starting from scratch!
Hi there. I've been told that children as young as 7 are old enough to understand a discussion about homosexuality. And until kids are in their teens (although I think it might be younger) they take their cues about good / bad, right / wrong from their parents (family?). So Now might be as good a time as any. As you suggested, as they get older they'll pick up signals (negative messages) from their (misguided / uninformed) peers.
In my opinion, your right the earlier you tell the is probably the better, it makes it alot easier to accept it and if they don't have any prior veiws on homosexuality then them growing up with someone they love who's gay will make them see it's not a bad thing and it's completely normal. It might be a good idea for your mom to tell em for you though.
Yeah, the sooner the better sounds a lot easier than waiting it out. The situation is kind of complicated though, but nothing major. They aren't step related, but they also do not live with our mother either. ..and to add more, they go to church every week. They do follow the beliefs and I think that might make it even more of a difficult matter and harder for them to accept. They aren't overly relligious or anything, so it might not be too much for them. I don't know. I guess the best I can do is just try and explain to them, and see what comes of it.
My brother is 9 almost 10 and he doesn't know about me. He is a little more immature than other kids his age but even so I feel like I should tell him however my parents want me to wait until I'm either in a serious relationship or he is 13 which ever comes first. Have you talked to your mom about telling them? If not maybe you can see what she thinks and maybe get some suggestions. It's up to you what you want to do but I would make sure that they are mature enough to handle it but seeing as I don't know them I can't say if they are ready or not because its not about age but maturity. some 8 year olds are mature and some aren't but I think your sister is old enough to know since she is 12. Like I said talk to your mom or another family member and see what they think since they know them. Whatever you decide to do, good luck. Sam
