I have finally started to come out as a lesbian at the age of 28. I have told my Actors Group, some of my political friends and I've joined a local Gay Book Group but I now feel like I've stalled. I have finally started to do the terrifying thing and come out and actually nothing is different. In some ways that feels good because one of the things I was scared about in coming out was that I'd become defined as 'the lesbian' rather than myself and in my Actors Group that definitely hasn't happened, everyone is treating me exactly like they always have but in other ways it is frustrating. I don't want to come out to my parents when I've never even had a girlfriend because I can't see the advantage in having that awkward conversation for no real reason, I can picture it going something like this - "You know how you think I'm straight and perpetually single? I'm actually gay and perpetually single." - "So, do you have a girlfriend?" - "No, I've never had a girlfriend but now I'm telling you I'm a gay woman who's never had a girlfriend." - "Oh". It just all seems like a lot of drama and trauma with still no girlfriend or resolution at the end of it!
Well, maybe start looking for a relationship! (Try online or with people in your area!), do what you're comftorable with!
I think it will still be worth it (not that I've done it myself yet, lol). I've heard it said that if you wait till you have a girlfriend, your parents might think that it's the gf's 'fault' or that they 'turned you'. With me, I worry that I'll end up with a man (because I'm bi) and it will have been pointless coming out to parents. However, I am going to tell them because if I do get with a woman I will want them to be prepared. As you're gay, I reckon you will definitely have a girlfriend one day, so I think you might as well tell them in advance so that when you do have a woman to introduce to them they'll have had time to get used to the idea. Also, I think that if you're being the person you really want to be you're more likely to attract like-minded people. But I am a bit of a hippy like that ... I'm being pretty bossy considering I only came out to four people myself, aren't I? Sorry, haha. It's hard coming out nearing 30, isn't it? I'm actually enjoying it though.
