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Facebook and coming out

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by NouvelleVague, Sep 28, 2013.

  1. NouvelleVague

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    Hi :slight_smile:

    So, yeah.
    I've been thinking about coming out as a lesbian on Facebook.
    Yeah, that far. Although, I'd like your advice, guys...
    I'll give your the facts to help me deliberate on this... (That's the list so far)

    The PLUS :
    - I live in Belgium -> Rather open country.

    - I'm at university -> People supposedly not so much judgmental/stupid

    - I've been acting straight for so long, lying to the world and to myself -> I want to be my true self, especially through in the eyes of others. Everyone. Including my bigoted uncles and cousins; including the (so-called) friends, etc.

    - Fed up -> Right, so, I received this piece of advice : Oh, well, you shouldn't tell the world, it nobody's business. Right... Wait, so it's everyone's business if you're heterosexual but not the other way round ?

    - Letting people know -> Like, seriously, some girls around here just are naturally flirty with each other. And then some of them, even with me. And I'm like O_O WOMEN YOU TURN ME ON, IF ONLY YOU KNEW x___x


    The MINUS
    - I had a boyfriend last year which is well-appreciated/rater popular around -> Might affect his feelings and the way people see him [They might feel sorry for him ? Or like, look down on him ?]

    - Although -> He tried to go and 'steal' my friends (No, really, he went until flirting with them. Like, alright, sorry but I don't think I should care about his whatsoever feelings x_x)

    - Close-minded people -> I thought some of my close friends would have been more open minded, but weren't (at all.)

    - Sexuality is fluid, and so am I -> I came out as a Bisexual to ease things to people around me. But really, the more I acknowledge the facts, the more I come to the conclusion that, ... No, seriously, I don't need nor want guys.
    Anyway fluidity -> conflict with limited people misunderstanding that it is a very complicated thing...

    _____
    So yeah. Been trying to make a statement. Don't want to make it too subtle, but don't want to make it too ... like... IN YOUR FACE either. I thought about blogging, as I blog a lot then post my stuff on Facebook, not knowing who reads it, etc, etc.

    A little advice ? :slight_smile:
     
  2. Mirko

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    Hi there! Well, you have some pretty good reasons to come out and be yourself around others. You can help others to understand you better by saying that you are still trying to understand your feelings better, but want them to know that you are questioning.

    I wouldn't worry about how others will see your former boyfriend. It is not about him, it is about you, and what you need to do, to live your life and be open about yourself.

    You could change your 'interested in' without making an announcement about it, and just let others draw the conclusions themselves. :slight_smile:
     
  3. NouvelleVague

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    I like this idea very much, actually :slight_smile: Ha, well, what our lives would be without social networking...
    Thanks for answering :slight_smile:))
     
  4. Colours

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    You seem to have really thought this out. For me, coming out on Facebook is unnecessary. The people that really need to know will be or have been told by me directly, or else they might feel passed. Others will find out eventually and I honestly don't care how they find out.

    However, that's just me, and if you feel this is the best way to do it, then sure, go for it! Do what you feel suits you and your situation best. :slight_smile:

    Congrats on having reached this stage, and I hope all goes well for you!