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Is it better to wait then to come out in a hostile environment?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Thequeenstruth, Oct 1, 2013.

  1. Thequeenstruth

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    The South
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Sometimes I find my self struggling with whether or not I should come out now, when I might not be greeted well at all, or to wait until I am out of the house. And then if I do wait should I wait until I finish college or even med school? Im confidant in who I am, just not in how I can deal with the fallout.
     
  2. Chels

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Who would you come out to? from the tone of the post I assume you're talking mainly about family?

    If that's it do you have any clue, any at all, on how they could take the news?
    The same question applies for friends too, but in my opinion, and also personal experience, I think it's "less strings attached" telling to friends than parents or any other relative.

    If you think your family and friends would be fine with it, I'd say just go for it; you seem sure about that, and I think that's what matters the most, there's no way to get around the consequences of dropping the news, but the more confident you are, the better it is.
    If you have the feeling some people might get in denial or take it the wrong way, and you depend on them for something, you might want to wait a while and be away from them or more independent, before talking to them.

    That's how I'd do it, but since I never really came out to my family take the advice for what it is, a simple suggestion.
     
  3. Thequeenstruth

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    I have several friends who are gay. Bi or whose parents are gay, or who I know would have no qualms about my being a lesbian, but every time I try to say somthing the thought of what if some how it trickles down to my parents. Well there is one guy who sorta knows just as I sort of know about him we've done every thing but a literal confirmation.
    Another thing that bothers me is a lot of people say things like oh youd make a great lesbian, and I find that everytime some one says somthing like that i get nervious as if a certain response would confirm everyones suspicions.
     
  4. Chels

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    If the only problem is your parents I'm pretty sure you can ask your friends, close or not, not to be open about it until you want them to.

    When I came out to my friends I asked them to keep it on the down low, and they never told anyone, nor they just bailed out on me.