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how to come out to parents as ftm?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by dr3sd3n, Oct 2, 2013.

  1. dr3sd3n

    Regular Member

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    i'm fifteen, transgendered, and totally lost. i would love to be seeing a gender therapist, endocrinologist, anything in order to get things going. i started a public transition not long ago, asked my friends to use male pronouns, changed my gender on facebook, etc etc. i'm now beyond certain that this is who i am and what i want to do.
    unfortunately, my parents have no idea. despite the fact that i have been heavily hinting at it for quite a while.

    how should i bring up the subject? i know they'll be supportive, i just... don't know how to bring it up. i'm afraid of things changing or them being disappointed in me or not taking me seriously. :help:
     
  2. Mirko

    Admin Team Advisor Full Member

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    Hi there! First of, congrats on your journey thus far. Pad yourself on your shoulder, if you haven't done so yet. :slight_smile:

    You have mentioned something important: you know that your parents will be supportive. The chances of them being disappointed are slim. That said, your parents might need to adjust their own ideas about, and dreams of what the future will look like but, and according to what you have mentioned, it doesn't sound like that your parents would have a lot of problems with adjusting their own dreams for you.

    What you might want to think about is talking to one parent first, so to make it easier on yourself. It's always easier talking to one, than to both parents at the same time. :slight_smile:

    Given that you have been hinting for a while, your parents might have already picked up a few clues that something is going on and that you might want to have a chat with them soon. Think about a good time to talk with one or both of your parents. Try to find a time where your mom and/or dad have time to listen to you, and you know you have their full attention.

    You already have a good way into the conversation, in that you can start the conversation with having given hints, and with having tried telling them something over the last little while. You can build your coming out on that. Writing out all of the things you would like to say could also help you with getting ready to speak with them.

    If you find that talking about it is too difficult (which is perfectly alright), you can also use what you have already written out, in a letter that you can give to them to read. :slight_smile: