For years I have thought I was bisexual. Now that I am at college I identify as gay. I am only out to a few friends but most people tell me you can't be bisexual. So I just decided since I was more sexually attracted to guys id say I was gay. I am pretty sure i am gay but i can't decide for sure, so how should I go about making a final decision? I am finally to a point in my life where I feel the need to tell my parents. Should I come out to them as bi or gay? I mean once I'm out there is no going back in the closet. And I know my parents are going to be very disappointed regardless.
The thing that pushed me from bi' to gay was watching the video Prayers For Bobby. I saw myself in Bobby so strongly it decided me on saying that I'm gay. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ys5TyY8RaxI
Hmm...that's a tough one. I know a lot of gays make the mistake of coming out as bi when they know they are really gay (or strongly suspect it.) I did this when I was young but it was more out of a sense of "I want to be straight and this is the closest I will get." It wasn't because I had attraction to both sexes. You say you are more attracted to guys. Do you have any sexual attraction to girls? If you do I would think you are bi, on the gayer side of bi but still bi. If not I'd think you are gay...Be honest with yourself. Who do you notice when you are out in public? Do you notice the hot guys and the hot girls? For me I only really notice the women and with the guys I think "meh." That's why I consider myself to be gay. Bisexuality does exist, but I think it is misunderstood. From what I can tell, just from being on EC, is that most bisexuals have a preference. It seems that this preference only grows stronger as people get older. Don't quote me on that, I'm not bisexual and my opinion only comes from reading about others experiences on EC. If you have a strong preference for guys and really only see yourself dating guys in the future I would come out as gay. Whatever you decide good luck! Coming out to parents is tough.
I definitely notice guys more. I usually only notice guys actually. But when I see a gorgeous girl I do notice her and think wow she is so beautiful. But sometimes I think I just say that because I am so used to forcing myself to like girls. I don't know if I just notice they are pretty or if im actually attracted to them. And yes my parents will be exceptionally tough because they are very conservative and Christian.
When you see a beautiful gal, how do you feel about it? Do you get the butterflies in your stomach or is it just an aesthetic appreciation of beauty? If or when you fantasize about women, do you genuinely enjoy the fantasy or does it feel like you're "going through the motions". Also, how do your feelings compare when you see a hot woman to when you see a hot man?
I don't get that butterfly feeling with girls but I thought maybe I just haven't found the right girl yet? When I see a handsome guy I definitely those feelings though. I have been with several girls but never felt love. But when I was in high school I fell in love with my best friend (male) and although I never told him my feelings, I have never truly had those unexplainable feelings like I had and still somewhat have for him. BTW I watched the film in the link above "Prayers for Bobby" and literally cried the entire movie.
