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How do you know if a boy is gay/bisexual? And if he likes you?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by TheSoleOne, Oct 26, 2013.

  1. TheSoleOne

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    United States
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    So there is a boy in my last hour class, and his name is Zach. He is a Junior (16 years old) Some what built hunk, as he plays soccer (V), Caucasian male. I'm a Sophomore (in the closet), (15 years old), Twink like body, as I also play soccer (JV), Hispanic. I met him just this year (3 months ago) and he has always been on my mind. The first day I saw him, I looked at him and admired his physical appearance, but throughout the year I developed a crush on him.

    Anyways during class when he would take out his writing utensils or flash drive, he would look at me for a while, I could see in the corner of my eye he would look at me. Then later, I turned to face him (to make sure), and I was right, but I quickly turned away. Though, I could still see him looking. Anyways his friend sits across from my table, and he goes there just to talk to him, but I always notice him look up to me then to his friends computer (constantly).

    He's helped me on a couple of projects, because he eavesdrops on the conversations I have with my friend. When I asked my friend some questions he would answer them.

    When I would have to present my projects, he would answer the questions I would ask to the class (He didn't with other projects).

    Just yesterday I was walking out of Chemistry with my friend. I dropped her off at her class then headed back to my Algebra II class, and I saw him with his friend, he looked at me for a second, and kept walking for 2 seconds, then turned around again and took a quick glance at me.

    Anyways he's never had a girlfriend (as far as I'm concerned), He doesn't go to homecoming, I didn't see him there. He's never had a homecoming date or any type of date. He seems straight when you talk to him, but that has nothing to do with his sexuality.

    What should I do? I talk a few times everyday in class, he cracks a couple of jokes, which I laugh at, and he's a great guy.
     
  2. Saturn7

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    In orbit
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    I personally don't think there are any tell-tale signs as to someone's orientation. Especially from what you describe from a situation like this.

    For example, when I used to go to clubs, on occasion I'd be approached by gay guys. I'm slim, wore shirts that fit me, and could dance to the beat. So, according to a lot of people, I'd be 'gay' just for those things. Now you can see how silly these 'signs' are.

    All your information seems to be second hand, or observed. When someone wants something, they will often find what they're looking for.

    I advise you to deal with these fantasies with cold hard facts. Get to know him. Be a friend.

    In every good, decent relationship I've had, genuine friendship has been a huge part of that. Your partner should be one of your best friends as well as your lover. That's just my opinion, but it has served me well.

    There's no way he's going to tell you the truth about stuff unless he trusts you - and you should be the same. Respect yourself :slight_smile:

    If you really like him, then you really need to get to know him, as a human being before an object of desire.

    If it turns out that he isn't bi or gay or whatever, if he's a nice person then you would hopefully have made a good friend. And trust me, the bond of true friendship is something beautiful that will transcend time and physical space.

    So take your time, and enjoy the journey. Don't let yourself be carried away by imposed romantic fantasies of others.