Hello all, let me present me here as ThisIsNotSparta (300 anyone?). I have been always a person with problems of all kind. Now, I have discovered that Im feeling things with boys. And I hate that. Im ashamed of myself. I really want to be the person I was, but now, now I cant tolerate myself. The biggest problem is that Im Chirstian. I have been praying God, and I thought He could help me. But he couldnt. Some people are proud of being gay. I am ashamed of thinking in boys. I really want to love a girl. In fact, I loved one, but now Im disorientated. I really want to be a straight guy again.
Hey, first off welcome to EC Second, give yourself a break in the nicest possible sense. I know how hard it is, but as I have been told by many christians, god doesn't make mistakes. I suppose what I mean by this is that god loves everyone it is possible to be gay and christian. I'm not really the best person to talk to about religion, but there are lots of people on here who are religious.. so try and find some of them to talk to about it. There is also no point being ashamed. Being gay really isn't something to be ashamed of, it's just who you are. If you are indeed gay/bi then you never really where "a straight guy" .. and there is no point trying to be something your not. It's not easy but stay around, start exploring who you are and try to be honest with yourself. Life will get easier if you are honest to yourself and stop trying to hide. Good luck and stick around
Welcome to EC! First off, could you give us some idea how old you are? I've got different advice for 15-year-olds than I do for 25-year-olds. However, I will say a few things that I can state as unequivocal facts. * Being Christian does not preclude you from being gay. * Being gay does not preclude you from being Christian. * Being gay does not preclude you from being happy. We're called "gay" for a reason. Stick around, chat with some more folks, and enjoy your stay. We'll help you through this, however it turns out. Lex
Hi there and welcome to EC! There is nothing wrong with feeling things for boys or guys. This is who you are, and there is nothing to be ashamed about. It will take a while to get used to the new feelings and thoughts and to figure your sexual identity out but you will overcome this hurdle. Trust me. Maybe what would help is talking to a counselor or therapist about it. Often when we process our thoughts out loud it will help us to understand them better and we have an easier time coming to terms with it. This site has also a number of good resources on sexual identity/coming out which might also help you in sorting some things out. But the most important thing (and as mentioned above) is that you are honest and truthful with yourself. I believe in God as well. For a very long time I prayed and asked God to help me to find a girlfriend and make me like girls. It never happened. Then I started to look at it from a different perspective. If God really wanted me to be straight, he would have made sure that I am. But given that I like guys and could never really develop any feelings for girls, God must be okay with it then. What it comes down to is that God loves everybody, no matter what their sexual orientation is. For me, God is about love, respecting others and myself and being there for others. This is what the ten commandments are in part all about. It took a while to figure all this out but truth be told, I'm a lot happier having come to terms with my sexuality. I have accepted that maybe this is what God wanted me to be in the first place. I hope this helps. If you want to talk or chat feel free to pm me anytime and/or add me on MSN. Cheers!
I can't do it. I can't keep them in that way I want. Its a shame for me, no matter how many people tell me other thing. I need help, and I know that anyone can't help me.
Acceptance, with your sexual orientation, really has to come from with in you, no one can solve this "problem" except yourself. I know it's, a hard thing to be honest about, especially like you said earlier that you were once in love with a girl. Being gay/bi is nothing to be ashamed of at all. It may take you time to accept who you are though. I also agree with everyone else's advice, you can be gay and christian. I hope you find comfort and answers in E.C. I did!! Oh and Welcome!!! :icon_bigg (!)(!)
Welcome to EC....there is a really good movie that you should watch. It's called For the bible Tells Me So and you can purchase it for something like $20 (www.forthebibletellsmeso.org) or you can rent it from Netflix. I think it will be enlightening for you! Click on the title at the top of the web page to learn more about the movie.
Hi again! Try watching the movie that Becky has suggested. The feelings that you are experiencing are perfectly normal and again there is nothing to be ashamed about. Don't try to push them away. The feelings will come and go until you have figured out everything. Stick around on EC and talk to us. I'm sure it will help you. As suggested earlier, maybe it would be a good idea if you would talk to a counsellor or psychologist. Give it a try and maybe this will help you in starting to figure your identity out. Remember: YOU ARE NOT ALONE in this! People can and will help you. Hope this helps!
Welcome to EC! Accepting your sexuality can be hard, but I think spending some time here at EC will be one thing that can help. I know it helped for me. I also suggest this movie. But, you don't have to buy it. Mike (Beebo) had a thread about it and provided a link to watch it.
