Hey, I have wanted to come out for ages now and after not being able to sleep last night due to my dysphoria I figure I have to do it soon. So I wish to come out today but I have a giant fear in doing it, I want to come out to my mum. I believe she will accept me and if I could only come out to her I would be able to come out to everyone else too (my logic don't argue) but its just that fear in talking to her. I know I have to tell her in person because letters and email wouldn't work in my situation. I am pretty good at speaking so there shouldn't be any problem there but it's just that fear. I feel like I can I open my mouth and no words come out. I need help, how do you get over the fear of coming out for the first time?
It's a common misconception that we are supposed to get rid of fear in order to overcome obstacles. That simply isn't true. There isn't one specific way to just get rid of fear and just live without a care, but it simply isn't possible. It's human to be afraid. However, what you can do is meet your fear. You're not going to get over fear, but you can let it not own you. You need to look within yourself, take a deep breath and jump in. Feel the fear within yourself. Let yourself get a little anxious. That way, instead of trying to eliminate your fear, you can move with it. All it takes is some focus, dedication, and some deep breathing. Get yourself into the calmest state you can, and just jump in.
I have to agree with Abbra. At least some of that fear never goes away, but you just have to overcome it. Easier said that done, I know. It does become easier with every person you tell though, because you become more comfortable doing it each time. And when you have told enough people, and you have a good support network, it starts to matter less what the next person thinks. Again, easier said that done, but, trust me, you'll feel better after you do it.
