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Coming out and talking about feelings

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Iamqm, Nov 10, 2013.

  1. Iamqm

    Regular Member

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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
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    Hey, it's my first time asking for advice here ... And I'm very bad at it anyways... So, I've been questioning since about three years. I used to think I might be gay, but that's not the case anymore, I now identify as bisexual or as not straight. And I'm okay with that. I mean, I don't love it but I don't hate it either. But I the problem is, I can't really talk about it. And it's not just not being able to come out, I can't talk about my feelings in general. Especially romantic feelings. And yes, I do know that my sexual/romantic orientation doesn't define me as a person but I feel so imprisoned... Has anybody been in a similar situation ? How did you deal with it ?
     
  2. BookDragon

    Full Member

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    Out to everyone
    I can totally relate to not talking about feelings...they've never made much sense to me, although they are starting to...

    I've discovered if I ever express something I feel deeply but struggle to get across I'll say it and then say 'nah, not really' or something dismissive. Play it off as a joke.

    I told my friend I wanted to lose weight so one day I could wear a bikini without looking terrible, then joked about it and he got really cross with me! That's as close as I've really got to easily expressing emotion recently and that took a lot of work.

    It helps if you can at least identify what emotion it is you want to express. Hell broken sentence work for romantic stuff. HIM. NICE. MAKE GOOD. FOR ME. NO. YUM! I'm sorry that probably wasn't much help :frowning2:
     
  3. BornInTexas

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    Before I came out to my bestest friend at the moment, I had trouble expressing or talking about what I was feeling in general mostly due to shyness. I especially couldn't express my romantic feelings for guys so I usually wrote that in a journal or diary, whichever you prefer to call it. Writing held me over for a while, and it was good for me because I'd need to find the exact words to what I was feeling in order to identify the emotion like ElliaOtaku said.

    Writing helped me understand my emotions and figure out how to express them without needing to write them down or feeling awkward. :slight_smile: I hope that helps in some way.
     
  4. Projectfabulous

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    I was never really comfortable talking about my feelings because I always felt like I was bothering people and that they were just a waste of time. Then, I got a few friends who showed legitimate interest in my feelings and they themselves were comfortable with talking about their feelings. I found that if I could slowly be more open about my feelings and whatnot over time. I would start with something small and slowly tell them more and more. Now, I'm pretty much indifferent about it.

    ^^I don't know if that makes any sense whatsoever, but I hope it helps :slight_smile: