I've been best friends with this girl for the majority of my life. She means everything to me and always will. We've always been close, practically one person, and she also happens to be bisexual. I've never been attracted to a girl before but I am with her. She never flirted with me or tried to persuade me into having an attraction to her but I did anyways, and one day I kissed her. Since then we had a rocky road of trying to figure everything out, and then began to date. We're about to celebrate our three month anniversary of being official. We are both college freshmen at different schools so our relationship is long distance. Only our closest friends know that we are together, and neither of our families know that we are even attracted to girls. She's found one girl at school that she's especially close with, and even though I know nothing is going on, I still cant help but be really jealous. Nobody at school knows about this and I just feel trapped. I know i'm in love with her and I don't want to lose her, but everything Is just so overwhelming. I feel like there aren't many people I feel comfortable telling about it because its so weird to only be attracted to one girl but otherwise be straight, most of my friends don't know, and i'm also incredibly sad that we're so far apart. Is this whole situation somewhat normal? I don't know what to do about any of it :/
You should read this thread http://emptyclosets.com/forum/coming-out-advice/96608-i-asked-my-roommate-if-hes-gay.html It was about a guy who was straight with the exception I being attracted to his best friend and overall it is a great read
I think long distance relationships are hard no matter what the orientation. The dynamic chances immediately. You now have to work harder than normal to remain intimate. You have to trust each other, and find creative ways to nurture the relationships despite the gap in the sky. It's very difficult, and the reason most do not survive under the circumstances. Your jealousy is natural-even as a friend. The want to spend time growing close to one another will always be there. Keep in mind, college is a hurdle, but it's possible to walk through to the other side hang in hand, and stronger before. Have you openly communicated your feelings to your GF?
As far as being straight with one exception, it's also possible she's just the first girl you have felt strongly enough about to question things and consider dating a female...that's what happened with me. I am now married to the girl who was my one exception.
Yeah, unfortunately coming out as "straight with one exception" probably won't be easy. People will assume you're in denial. I would probably argue that in your situation both "straight" and "bisexual" are about equally valid ways that you could potentially choose to identify (on the one hand, you do have the ability to be attracted to both sexes, but on the other, you probably wouldn't bother pursuing relationships with women in general). That said, I always feel that the best way to identify when you don't fit in a neat little box is to describe your situation and be as indifferent to labels as you can when people start demanding that you pick one. Of course, I'm oversimplifying a little because I don't know what peoples' attitudes/education about LGBT stuff is like where you live. Its a complicated situation to be sure. I wish you the best!
