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will i change? is it a phase

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by spacepig, Nov 13, 2013.

  1. spacepig

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    I fancy I guy in my class so this has made me want to come out even more but every time I even think about bringing it up I always stop myself thinking I might change and that its.. Just a phase. Has anyone been attracted too girls and guys during their teens but then stopped liking guys later??
    Thanks
     
  2. BookDragon

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    It might, it might not. One thing worth thinking about. What if it doesn't and you spend forever saying "I'll snap out of it soon...".

    Not saying you should definitely come out RIGHT now, just something to think about.
     
  3. Lexington

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    For most people, sexuality is somewhat fluid. I don't necessarily mean you'll be 100% gay one day and 100% straight the next. But even people who are completely straight or completely gay from start to finish will see their tastes changing. Which is actually a great thing, or else I'd still be mooning after those skate rats I thought were cute in my teen years. :slight_smile:

    If you've been finding people of both sexes attractive for awhile, it's probably safe to call yourself bisexual.

    Lex
     
  4. spacepig

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    Hi, thanks for the reply's, I think I'll wait a while just to be sure but not too long, but its not that I don't want to be bisexual its that if I'm going to jump out of my bisexual closet I don't want to have to crawl back in a straight one later!
     
  5. BookDragon

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    You understand of course that if you are bisexual you can still date girls right? There IS no crawling back in...
     
  6. spacepig

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    Yeah I know i meant that its just that people would still assume I was bi like they assume I am straight now, and if I said I was no longer bi then i I don't think people would understand that I'm wasn't coming out bi for attention like some people in my school have done
     
  7. Nyarlathotep

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    well, it's important to be yourself and not apologize for it, i think. If people tell you that they think you did it for attention you can always explain the real story to them, plus, even if you go from bi to straight in the future, that still means that right now you are bi so you should live bi, you know? Just be who you are now and don't worry if your tastes change in the future, then you'll just follow those new tastes. It's important to be yourself and not worry about what other people think
     
  8. GayLibertarian

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    In the couple years after I realized I was gay, I questioned it so many times. "But what if this" and "But what of that?" made me seriously reconsider coming out and made pinpointing my sexuality a pain. Eventually those concerns sputtered out after I got completely comfortable being gay, and sure, I think "straight" thoughts here and there, but I know for certain that I'm gay. For me it just took time, understanding and a slow buildup of comfort.
     
  9. spockbach

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    I know that sexuality can flip-flop a lot; you might mostly like girls and like the occasional dude. Or you might be gay. Don't worry too much about it - liking people is only natural (or not liking people, if you're asexual, which is fine too).
     
  10. spacepig

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    Thanks for the advice :slight_smile:
     
  11. spockbach

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    No prob!! :slight_smile: