1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

So... how to go about this?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Etak, Nov 14, 2013.

  1. Etak

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2013
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    In the U.S.
    I've been through the awkward stage of maybe-I-am, maybe-I'm not a lesbian, I've come out to myself and many of my friends/family, and I've felt better every time I did. Now I think I'm ready to burn Narnia. I want the rest of the way out. Making sly little jokes about it was fun for a while, but that's gotten boring. It's gotten to the point where I have to stop and think about whether I'm out to everyone in the room or not before I speak, and it's becoming more trouble to stay closeted than it would be to come out.

    So my question is, how do I do this? I've already come out to all the easy people. My Grandmother is really conservative and traditional. I don't know if she'll ever accept it, but I know she'll love me no matter what. I'm afraid to tell her because I don't want to make the holidays awkward. My Sensei will probably be fine, he's just very Japanese. I'm mostly scared of that because he means so much to me. Finally, one of my friend is in the dark. I was going to tell her, but she made some comment about how she'd be afraid to have a lesbian friend, because she'd be constantly afraid they'd have a crush on her. I told her why that's stupid, but she didn't change her view. I playfully flirt with her and her sister all the time, so it's awkward. I don't have a crush on wither one of them. I'm just a natural flirt. Heck, there's a boy that I still flirt with just out of habit.

    What to do, what to do? Mass FB post? Announce it in my annual poetry book that I give out at the end of every year? Talk to each person individually? It's not that I feel the need to tell the world, it's just that I want to be who I am without fear. Any suggestions on the most graceful method of exiting the closet?
     
  2. BookDragon

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2013
    Messages:
    4,605
    Likes Received:
    12
    Location:
    Cambridge, UK
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Well your friend is the easiest one, even if she is being a bit stupid about it. Facebook might accomplish that one quite nicely.

    Your grandmother...I dunno, I'm still of the opinion that grandparents who MIGHT not be accepting can be left in the dark until they HAVE to be, but that's not for everyone. With her, I'd sit her down with someone else who she can talk to. Tell her gently and then get her to speak to whoever you brought with you.

    Your sensei, I don't know what your relationship with him is or anything but does he need to know?
     
  3. Etak

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2013
    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    In the U.S.
    Thanks for your replay. :slight_smile: I adore your signature, by the way. You're probably right, my friend is just being irritating. My grandmother is always asking me about the cute boys in my classes, I'm just tired of lying. My grandfather already knows, and is fine with it. My Sensei and I are really close; I'm the student that he trains the hardest. Our relationship is one built on complete honesty for the sake of self-improvement. Plus, he's the one I run to when I don't know how to deal with things in my life. My father is dying and not really in my life anymore, and my Sensei is the one who has helped me through it.