Hi guys! Last week a close friend of mine told me that he’s gay (I knew that for a fact since I know him, about 8 months ago) the thing is that I really respected him so for that reason I decided to wait until he told me and to see if he is honest at least with me. He is a great person (almost perfect guy) and also he has a boyfriend since 3 years ago, they really like each other. In the other hand, I’m really friendly and kind with everybody (I’m a bit popular) I look straight but in fact I’m gay too (I’m in the closet so nobody knows and also my friend is in the closet). My dear friend is really nice with me, so polite and careful, he often call me or text me and I think that he is in love with me or flirting with me but in other moments I think he is not. Sometimes I think that all these things are wrong, I just told my mother about my sexuality a few days ago and I’m not sure about what she or my family thinks about it (well only she knows). I really love my family but I accept myself too. I know I’m gay since long but since a few months ago is that I’m trying to fit in myself and my circles. I fell in love with him since almost I knew him but I don’t know if it’s a good idea to tell him that I’m gay or that I love him or maybe is better to stop seeing him or talking to. Any advices people? Thanks in advance.-
You can certainly tell him that you are gay any time you are ready; he probably already has a good idea that you are. It would also be reasonable to tell him how you feel about him, and that you have held your feelings in check because you knew that he had a boyfriend, so you did not want to intrude on that relationship. You will have been honest to him. Hopefully he will be honest with you and tell you how he feels about you, which might be that he only considers you to be a good friend, not someone he feels a love attachment to. Having his feelings out in the open will help you know whether you should move on or not, and it does not mean that you cannot continue to be good friends, just that you have established the boundaries that will guide your future interactions and prevent any problems that might arise from misinterpretations of things that are said or happen.
