1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Who am I?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Blaz, Jun 17, 2008.

  1. Blaz

    Blaz Guest

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2008
    Messages:
    153
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male
    The more I look around, the more I realize that I'm beginning to "grow out" of my gayness it seems. I know that I'm probably Bi, and I don't have too much o problem accepting it. However, as I grow older, I'm beginning to be more and more attracted towards girls and just a little less towards guys. I know that many doctors think that same sex curiosity is a phase of adolescence, and may or may not continue into adulthood, and I'm wondering if I am more straight than I realize.

    I know sexuality can be fluid, but this change has been gradual and consistent, I used to almost NEVER be turned on by girls, now I am. What do you guys think?
     
  2. otc877

    otc877 Guest

    I think that you should be less concerned with labels, and just do what you feel is right and comes naturally. If you're attracted to women, awesome! Make babies.

    If you're attracted to men, awesome! Adopt.

    ...assuming you want kids

    In all seriousness, only you truly know what you like. Don't think too much about why you're turned on by something, but instead enjoy being turned on by something :slight_smile:
     
  3. Steve

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 30, 2008
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Born in australia, but now living some where else
    Gender:
    Male
    my advise is not to adopt children for male gay parents ... since for the fact is at these times , the fact that a kids has to fathers m8 cause him shame in school or make him feel uncompterble having friends over and is basicly thinking of yourself insted of the child himself
     
  4. Blaz

    Blaz Guest

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2008
    Messages:
    153
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male
    That's true, but I think that having divorced parents causes more damage to the child's psychology than two loving male parents.
     
  5. Mirko

    Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2008
    Messages:
    18,870
    Likes Received:
    3,203
    Location:
    Northern Hemisphere
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I definitely agree with oct877. There is no reason to label yourself. As we go through the various stages of life, we will develop different feelings. It is possible that you are bi and have become aware of that side of you only now. I wouldn't worry too much about it. Try figuring out 'what's happening' and see what feels right. As with everything in life, follow your instincts. I hope this helps a bit!
     
  6. pirateninja

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Messages:
    579
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bath, England
    All I can say is; just go with what feels right for you. Like Otc said, you know you better than we do. We cannot say "be gay", "be straight" or "be bi". Whatever feels right for you and what makes you happy should be the right choice.

    Who are you? You are you. Whether gay, bi or straight. Whether you think "Ooh, he/she's hot." If you are not sure, then you don't have to be. Just go with the flow.
     
  7. Psychedelic Bookmarks

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 24, 2007
    Messages:
    1,481
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    Well, if you feel yourself becoming more straight, just go with it :slight_smile: That's fine, you know. Just be yourself. That advice will never change. If people seek to call your gayness a phase, take that as you will. Maybe it is/was, maybe it isn't, it's doesn't really matter. Go with the flow. You might even find it changes again in the future!
     
  8. skyoverland

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 29, 2008
    Messages:
    30
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    El Paso, TX
    Gender:
    Male
    I think that is natural. I mean I feel this attraction towards some men, I just don't see a guy and think he is cute or sexy or anything thing. I think it is a case by case option. Some girls I think are hot and I want to know them better and the same thing for men. I think over thinking the situation tends to lead toward some rough edges.
     
  9. Grantious

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2007
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Australia, Melbourne
    Hey, :-D

    Just don't think about it... Go with the flow, Don't worry be happy, ha ha I'm out of bad quote's but seriously if you fall in love with a girl then YAY or if u like/love a guy then W00T you know. I've found that over thinking stuff really doesn't solve anything and can make life more complected than it really needs to be!

    xoxo.
     
  10. Alexander

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2007
    Messages:
    176
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Red Hook NY
    I wouldn't worry about the labels too much. I had a near-straightness phase, but I'm "growing out" of that. But before that I grew into the nearly straight phase. Point is, right now it could go either way or end up in the middle for you. Either way, what do you have to be concerned about? If you're straight, great, you learned a lot about yourself and you are accepting of gay people. If you're gay, then that's fine too - we can't help who we love anyway.

    Go with the flow :slight_smile:
     
  11. Gumtree

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2008
    Messages:
    929
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Sydney - Australia
    Eliminate labels.

    You're not Bisexual, Homosexual, Heterosexual you're just sexual.

    Don't limit or force yourself, if you find a chick that you're attracted to that doesn't mean you're bi, same goes for a guy.
     
  12. FreddyMercury

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2008
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Arkansas
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    kids will be made fun of no matter what. if they are poor, if they are black, if they have a bad hair cut, if they are gay.... so who cares if you have two dads.

    but ya.. i agree with everyone else... you didnt take some "oath" to be gay. were not judging you if you like girls. enjoy life. dont worry about all this "am i gay, am i bi?" .. your just you.

    ~Trey
     
  13. Trumpetplyer23

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2008
    Messages:
    533
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    O-H-I-O!

    Yeah, divorce messes with kids. My parents used to fight all the time, until my dad moved out (and they still find times to fight), and I'm waiting 'till they are divorced.

    Like others have said, just go with the flow. It's just how life is.
     
  14. Blaz

    Blaz Guest

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2008
    Messages:
    153
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male
    "Go with the flow" and "Roll with the punches" are what a lot of people are telling me these days, haha. . .huh, it really makes me think that I need to stop and just live life, instead of contemplate and weigh things(Though it is important to think things through at times, I just need to stop doing it ALL the time).

    Anyways, thanks for the advice guys, it really helps!
     
  15. Mmmike

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2008
    Messages:
    71
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ontario; Canada
    I agree.
    Don't pick a label and just be who you are.
    You'll figure things out eventually.