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Denying,Confused,Accepting

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by quietchemicals5, Dec 12, 2013.

  1. quietchemicals5

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2013
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    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    I'm 19. I had 2 girlfriends in HS. 1 for 5 months (was not sexual attracted to) I only dated her because I felt like I needed a girl friend so people would quit asking if I was gay. My 2nd girlfriend was beautiful and a good person we dated for 9 months (I broke up with her, because I moved away and could never see myself living where she is now), plus i never had this deep appreciation and love for her. I did love her but not passionately. I, however; was proud she was my girlfriend. I think she loved me more than I loved her. We were sexually active but towards the end she wanted to have sex more than I did. I just became a little depressed because of school, work, personal teenage bs and I was planning my move.
    Anyway, I can find some girls attractive sexually and I want that ''picture perfect family'' but I haven't been with anyone in over a year. I think I want a gf but I don't want to date.

    I am attracted to some guys and I remember being interested in boys since I was little. Like generally interested in being with boys. One memory I have that i'm embarrassed and ashamed of was sleeping over with my friend and watching him shower and crawling in bed with him he was completely naked I was not. I wasn't interested in playing with him naked i just wanted to be next to him, I was curious about other boys and enjoyed the idea of being with him. This was never sexual! I didn't even know about sex. I think I was only 7 or 8.

    I know it's all over the place. but how do I come out to myself? How do I know if I'm gay?
     
  2. Yossarian

    Full Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Florida
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    The general test is whether you are sexually aroused by attractive males, or attractive women, or both. You know by now whether you like to look at one kind of picture or the other, I would think. That doesn't mean you would be sexually attracted to ALL men or women, only that when you do find someone you are attracted to, you would go by whether they are men or women, or both. Unless you are strongly attracted to one or the other, you are probably going to have to date both to figure out what your orientation is. Maybe the reason you don't want to date is that girls just don't "do it for you" any more. Try dating a boy and see if there is any more spark doing that. Don't be "ashamed" of doing it, that is just society laying a guilt trip on you for not doing what they want "normal" to be, which is what THEY are. Be YOU instead.
    __________________

    And if you want to be me, be me,
    And if you want to be you, be you,
    But there's a million things to do,
    You know that there are.
     
  3. oneday004

    Full Member

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    Location:
    alberta canada
    Been there done done that had a boyfriend and a wife ....... leaving wife.