So this is my first college semester and though I've learned a lot it has brought up a lot of problems. I decided no secretes in college, no hiding, and to be proud. Which I have done and I ve been very excited about it. This semester though I have gone through many things that have caught my mother's attention. I've gone through a flew flings at the begining and one girlfriend, which happened to be my first lesbian interaction and the closest thing to a relationship I've had. The stress mainly lies with the girlfriend and my mom frequently caught onto my odd behavoir because I was extra tired and extra irritated. Though now this period does not bother her, I have been talking with my dad who already knows and has for a while. While he has been supportive he has been presureing me. Not one week after finals my cousin (on my dads side) calls telling me that her mom now knows and is telling everyone. My worst nightmare. It is only a matter of time before everything comes out and I am left in the middle of an incredible amount of fighting and arguement. I don't think my mother will ever truely support me and because so many people know I now have to tell her before I go back to college in January. Its really incredibly stupid because she has SO many gay friends and she still thinks it is a sin and unholy or natural. But my dad for some reason thinks she can reason. The realtionship btwn me and my mother has been tense. She disagrees with my new attitudes toward gays and lgbt rights and I have been resentful and angry with her for being dismissive of the minority I have been speaking for and also for not being supportive and understanding of me even though I haven't even told her that. I just feel so much that she will reject the information and may even to punish me. I'm actually having to wait until her side of the family is gone after xmas because my dad and I are concerned about an 'intervention' they will deffinitly preform. How do I tell her and make things easier to absorb for her without coming off as hateful or silly? How do I peepare myself because I feel like I will honestly laugh so hard out of nervousness.
I think the best thing to do when talking to your mom is to tell your story. When did you first know, how did you feel when you were trying to decide who to tell? How did you feel with your first girlfriend. What are your anxieties what are your joys? Make sure she sees you as her daughter and as a human coming to her to let her in instead of a "hot button issue" coming to debate with her about morality and sexuality. Good Luck to you.
