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Ex-Gays

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Blaz, Jun 21, 2008.

  1. Blaz

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  2. Nanzuniko

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    Brainwashed indoctrination.

    Or bribery.
     
  3. Maddy

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    Denial and/or brainwashing. People can choose to only have relationships with people of the opposite gender, but that doesn't mean they can change which gender they're actually attracted to.
     
  4. MeskElil

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    It might be denial or brainwashing...but honestly, I'm never truly sure if I'm lesbian...so they might have just "snapped out of it", and I'm afraid that will happen to me...
    *sigh* Sorry, that's a story for a different thread.
    But they might just decide that they don't want to be gay and so they "become straight" even if it makes them miserable because they think it's right.
    Eventually, however, they might find themselves quite happy. So I don't think we should shun them for it...it's their way to try to make themselves happy.
     
  5. n1ck

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    If you accept the premise that there is a biological basis for homosexuality, as current medical understanding suggests, then it follows that a person cannot change his or her orientation.

    Personally, and on that basis, I think that it is harmful and prays on insecurity.

    And... Is it just me or do you find reparative therapy et al., for the most part, to be fueled by ulterior motives, such as intolerance and the agenda of the religious right, rather than a willingness to help, no matter how misguided that help might be?

    As the idiom goes... a leopard cannot change its spots. :slight_smile:
     
  6. Nanzuniko

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    It seems to be. Especially with those made up stories (or things added into them) to make someone who is having that problem to relate to it.
     
  7. Bryan90

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    Well I really think that there is no way of generalizing, blazikengz. I admit that perhaps that are ex-gays that don't really "convert". But that doesn't mean that sexuality is not fluid. Perhaps there are people with sexual fluidity and change time to time.
     
  8. n1ck

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    Yes, perhaps, but I wouldn't bank on it. The current evidence base certainly shows otherwise.
     
  9. Lexington

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    I can totally believe that somebody believed they were gay, and then decided they weren't. It's happened. But I have yet to encounter anybody who was gay, prayed to God to "cure" them, and then began living a truly heterosexual life. I do believe these people CAN live heterosexual lives, but they're forcing it. They're living counter to their programming - like walking on their hands everywhere they go because they don't want to walk on their feet. It's something one can force, I think. But seriously - why? Why work that hard?

    Lex
     
  10. Davey

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    I don't get why people think they can't have God in their lives and be gay all in the same. If God didn't want you to be gay don't you think he wouldn't have made us that way?
     
  11. Miaplacidus

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    I'm intensely skeptic about it. I think that there isn't such a thing as an "ex-gay", just repressed gays.

    Reparative therapy is harmful, and as such it has been banned in nearly every developed country. It is banned in Uruguay.
     
  12. Hoppip

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    I think they just hide under a religious façade to gain acceptance from the one group that rejects them.

    It's like Stockholm Syndrome, I guess.

    They just wanna be with the in-crowd. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  13. n1ck

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    Perhaps because they instead strive to build their beliefs on the basis of facts, scientific inquiry and logical principles - and not on the basis of the intellectually-limiting effects of authority, cognitive bias, conventional wisdom, popular culture, prejudice, sectarianism, tradition, urban legend or any other dogmatic or otherwise fallacious principle.

    Given presently-known facts, established scientific theories, and logical principles, there is no basis/evidence to support the existence of any supernatural phenomena, such as your God.

    While I agree that absence of evidence is not evidence of absence, so I cannot say that your God does not exist, it is illogical and completely irrational to structure your beliefs without it - and, in my view, doing so is tantamount to intellectual suicide.
     
    #13 n1ck, Jun 21, 2008
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2008
  14. Brett

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    I honestly am not repulsed so much by the idea that people think that we can be changed, but the fact that there are people out there that think that we have to be changed! People need to stop listening to these "Christians" and start listening to their common sense.
    Besides it's bad for a person's self asteem, and repressing something this important can lead to stress, which leads to high blood preassure and overall bad health.
     
  15. Willywilly92

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    if anybody htinks they have to change themselves cuz of a book their dumb. i understand religion can have a very strong take on someones life but i think u urself is more important than religion. just the thought of changin urself because of religion just pisses me off!
     
  16. n1ck

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    Totally agree...

    Freedom of thought is one of those principles we should all hold as being sacrosanct, no matter how repulsive we might find certain views.
     
  17. Defraction

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    Why is it only God who can change people's sexuality?
     
  18. s5m1

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    I do not believe we can "decide" to be gay or straight. I tried to choose being straight for most of my life and it did not work. We are who we are and need to accept it and be happy with it.
     
  19. Bryan90

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    Lol.. Brett... well said..
     
  20. Hmm I don't know, a lot of the time I wish it worked but I wish there was a scientific way to change not a superstitious one.