So I know I'm gay and I've known it for quite a while, but I'm not very comfortable with more than my close friends knowing. Now that I'm off to college and meeting openly gay people, I've discovered I'm nothing like that. I realize there's a spectrum and I'm on the straight side of gay but I don't feel all too gay. As a matter of fact I find myself somewhat annoyed by extremely flamboyant guys. More than that, I started to act more masculine being around so many other guys all the time. However, I opted out of joining a frat because I didn't feel like a "gentleMAN" or a "brother". I take these silly online quizzes of how gay I am and they usually say very little or not. The other night I spent the night sleeping next to and slightly cuddling with a girl in my floor, but I don't like her in that way, we're like best friends and I was just comforting her. There's only one person I think of in that way, one of my suite mates that I've gotten really close to, and I would suck his dick and let him fuck my brains out at the snap of his fingers. Its like i know I'm gay but I don't outwardly act it, so I don't feel it. Maybe since through middle school kids picked on me and accused me of being gay so much, I'm rejecting my gay self before anyone else can. Maybe I'm pretending to be straight so these straight guys (and only ever straight guys) that i like will still talk to me and not be awkward around me and allow me physical contact I so thirstfully seek. So conflicted. I know I just threw a lot out right now but if anyone could relate or help me make sense of this it would be much appreciated. Thanks.
Well sounds like you're kind of attracted to the same type of guys I am... I come off as totally straight as far as I know .... The men I'm attracted to... All act totally straight as far as I can tell .... I only know a few out gay guys though .... And don't feel attraction to them ....
I think your problem, and incidentally mine as well, is a pretty common one. I have masculine interests, I was in a fraternity in college, and no one would ever guess that I'm attracted to guys. And like you, flamboyant gay guys do nothing for me. To each his own, but that's just not what I like in a guy. So all in all, I feel like I have very little in common with the most visible part of the gay community. Just realize that there are masculine gay guys out there. I am certainly one of them. We are just harder to find because we are often still in the closet or not obviously gay. If I'm misinterpreting the problem, and you feel that you aren't being true to yourself, then that is something that probably needs to change. Don't try to be something you're not. In the end, that'll just make you unhappy.
Heres a question. So, you don't feel gay. Aside from liking to have homosexual sex, what does "gay" entail? What does being straight entail? You recognize you're gay. Be however you feel. There is no "right or wrong" to being gay.
I can definately relate. I'm a masculine bi guy and not cuz I don't want to seem like the gay stereotype but because it's who I am. You're just into guys who are masculine (which in my opinion, masculine guys are hotter ^_^) everybody has a type, lgbt or not.
I feel exactly the same. I enjoy being with women and enjoy kissing them and being physical but I just don't connect with the lesbian community. I don't identify as being anything other than straight. I'm basically straight but just enjoy sex and relationships with women.
