Hi everyone, I'm posting again because I've decided to come out to a wonderful gay friend on Monday and would love advice on what to say. So yeah, I'm still having the occasional zig zag of emotion regarding my sexuality but I know I'm gay and I accept that and I'm even starting to enjoy the idea of being gay, my point is, I feel that coming out on EC lifted a huge weight off of my shoulders and I know that coming out to my friend would make it feel more real and hopefully I'll get some wonderful advice on what to say to my straight, less open minded friends after all, I act rather stereotypically hetero and having grown up with a lot of these friends I don't think they would ever think I'd be gay. Now, my friend is gay, as stated, and came out to me when we were 11, he was always feminine and I always thought (with my narrow minded child brain) that if he was a girl I'd have fallen in love with him... I only very recently know now that I always thought he was cute but tried to justify my thoughts to make me feel like I wasn't gay too. Now, I'm meeting up with him for the first time in years and he's as cute as ever (he's been doing pole dancing lessons for a couple of years now, those legs...ahem...) and I thought I'd give him the same courtesy that he gave me by letting him be the first person I'm coming out to. I planned on coming out first to my bisexual friend but she's busy until next year. There's perks and cons, I mean, he's probably the sweetest, nicest guy on Earth, I know he'll accept me, but I hope he doesn't question my sexuality as I know what I am and I've had a hard time accepting that. More than anything though, I just want someone I know in person to talk to, and to accept me and advise me and give me their side of the story. Thanks for reading, I hope to hear what you guys have to say, your opinions always mean a lot (*hug*)
Sounds like this friend is the right person to come out to first. It sounds like he will be accepting of you and since he is gay, I'm sure he will have plenty of good perspective to give you. Although I haven't told many people yet, it does feel better once you tell someone. Good luck
Its a hard conversation to have but once i've told someone the weight is lifted and it feels amazing to really be myself around someone, anyone! lol Good luck.
Thanks! (*hug*) I feel really privileged to have someone like him coming back into my life, I'll keep you updated and it's nice to hear you feel better for telling someone
Sounds like a good choice for the first person to come out to, best wishes for "the talk". I suggest, especially since he's been out for a long time, that you make real clear to him that you aren't coming out to the rest of the world just yet, and that you know he'll understand you need to tell others at a pace you're comfortable with. If he's been out so long, he may not remember or think that it's such a big deal for others.
I think it's great you have him to come out to cause he will totally understand. Good to start out good But like awesomeyodais said if your not ready to tell everyone be sure to let him know. Good luck.
He sounds like the perfect choice of the first person to come out to. Let us know what he says; he might be more "into you" than you know, and has only been holding back because he thinks you are straight.
Thanks again for the brilliant advice everybody and Yossarian, thank you for the advice you give everybody, every time I read it (I read most people's threads as of late) I draw a lot of strength from the things you say, I really appreciate your opinion and I promise to keep you all updated! So yeah, I'm coming out to someone tomorrow... It's a mixture of worry and excitement as I haven't seen my friend in 5 years and I've missed him everyday, so catching up with him will be wonderful, is it weird that I really want to cuddle him when I see him? We're going to a cafe for tea and a chat and hopefully we'll head to my other friend's home and re-introduce him to everyone! (I might even re-introduce myself if the time feels right, although I'm not betting on it!) Thanks again everyone, EC really feels like a big family, where people can get help and hopefully, in time, help others. I love this place and I love you guys too, you help a lot of people be themselves and I can't express the weight you guys have lifted from me (either with your super helpful comments or by reading other people's threads and realising that you're not alone in the world) this place is life changing. And it's the people in it that make it possible. Thank you. It's not the end of the problems I face with my sexuality but I know I'd never be this close to happiness without you guys. (&&&) I'll post more as things develop! (!)
