Uncomfortable @ PRIDE

Like, how were you uncomfortable? Did you feel weirded out by the things you saw? What do you mean by uncomfortable?

 

A lot of people aren't comfortable around pride because a lot of the things displayed at pride portray the effeminate gay man and butch lesbian woman, and that's not what everyone is. There's nothing wrong with it, but you should just understand that you don't have to act like everyone there and you can just be yourself and love the pride that you show in yourself.

 

If you've never been to Pride, it can be a bit overwhelming. First off, you start seeing all the "flavors and colors" of homosexuality - volunteers, partiers, clubs, bears, what have you. Secondly, it may have been your first time in a large, openly gay area. Where the majority of folks are gay, and frankly, they don't care. It's possible that these two factors contributed to your feelings.

Lex

 

I agree with Lex. There are lots of different "flavors" at Pride! If you are not used to a "sexually open" environment, that in itself can make you feel uncomfortable. We took my daughter to her first pride parade and she was shocked to see the topless "Dykes on bikes". She said "don't people get arrested for that?" :roflmao: There was one particular guy in nothing but a speedo which made me a little uncomfortable. He was doing some suggestive moves to God knows what on the top of a truck. :roflmao: Stll Pride parades are lot of fun. There is alot of things that are not sexual including the gay athletic teams, welcoming churches, the Human Rights Campaign, PFLAG, and many others. I always have a blast at Pride. The one we have here in Central Oregon is very much milder. Nobody is half-naked. Its more about socializing and entertainment. So maybe if that Pride event wasn't for you, you could find one in a more rural neighborhood that you would feel more comfortable.

 

I wouldn't worry about - I've never been to a Pride event, but I think that I'd probably feel a little intimidated and out-of-place too. As has been said, I think there are many "flavours", and I also think that the fact is that we're just not used to being in a situation where most people around us are LGBT - and it can therefore be a bit strange. We are used to "normal" just as much as the person next to us.

Heck - the other day I couldn't stop staring at two girls kissing in public - I was like, OMG they're lesbians! Why are they kissing in public? I felt very uncomfortable, to be honest. But then I remembered that I like girls too, and I realised that I was as used to only seeing heterosexual PDA as the next person, and that I seemed to be exhibiting some residual homophobia, even after all this time on EC (although this isn't how I'm classing your experiences btw) - if this is how weirded-out I felt after seeing two (very sensibly dressed) girls kissing, how would I feel at Pride?

Don't worry about it too much. I'm sure you'll get more used to it over the years.

 

Were they actually topless as in naked topless?
It has always confused me how stuff like that can happen at a pride event, but if everyday random people were to do something like that, they'd be arrested .
I don't really see how that helps either =\

 

Well I saw them at the beginning of the parade with shirts on. My guess is that towards the end is when they removed them knowing there was just a couple more blocks to go.

 

omg omg omg! I'm exited I'm going to Pride this Saturday 28th.. with my friends :]]]
I really can't wait I'm looking forward to it since it's going to be our first time going to pride :]

I hope i like it

 

i went along to my local pride recently. it was alright at first but then these really loud girls started chanting "were here, were queer, we wanna have some beer", and i couldnt say why but that really annoyed me. like it cheapened it somehow. i just thought - well done, youve managed to make a rhyme, but what point are you trying to make??? maybe i took it too seriously....


i think the point is there are no guidelines about how youre meant to feel. however you felt was completely fine. you dont have to love going to pride just because youre gay

 

My friend went to DC's pride thingy the other week... she said I would've been incredibly uncomfortable. I dunno, I might have been but I couldn't say for sure. I guess I could try to get on over there next year and go with her or somebody. Could be interesting...?

 

People are usually pretty crazy at Pride. I went to the Denver Pridefest for the first time two days ago, and it was overwhelming, but in a good way. Everyone was really, really outgoing and welcoming, starting conversations with strangers and even dancing (drunkenly) with them. I never felt uncomfortable or out-of-place, although I think most people probably thought I was straight. (Ah, the dilemmas of a femme lesbian... )

What exactly made you uncomfortable? Some people go crazy, it's true, but there are a lot of mild-mannered people too who just mill around and sit in the park. I was one of those this last time.

 

It's not uncommon to be uncomfortable - I've always been quite uncomfortable around effeminate gay guys because I'm not like that at all - no-one had any clue I was gay before i came out, and were confused because I hate fashion, don't have the "gay accent" and don't do any of the stereotypical things.

I think it's the expectation that makes you uncomfortable, like because you're gay you're expected to act like many of the people in the parade or you should be doing some of the over-the-top things in the parade. Remember that everyone's different and it's alright to be uncomfortable, it doesn't mean you're not really gay or "you're not acting gay enough". Everyone has different likes and dislikes, so if it makes you uncomfortable don't feel any obligation to go.

 

well it could have something to do with chicks on rollerblades handing out banana flavored condoms and copies of kama sutra: the musical xD ohhh that was a fun chicago pride parade

 

I went to my first Pride last weekend as well, and although I thought I would be uncomfortable, it wasn't like that at all. I went with some friends who have been out for quite some time, so they were my "guides", pointing out to me the different things to see. Yes, there were some people "showing too much" here and there, but it didn't feel intimidating.

Since I am not completely out yet, one of my worries was bumping into someone I know, which actually ended up happening: I saw an ex co-worker who didn't know I was gay (he is not; was there with his girlfriend just passing by -- or so they said ;-) When I saw him, my legs got all shaky at the beginning, but then I suddenly realized that it wasn't really the end of the world, so I decided to approach him to say hello. The look of surprise in his face was actually very amusing. He didn't mention or asked anything, though, and was as friendly as usual.

My feeling at the end of the experience we positive over all. If I felt uncomfortable at all it was because I am not a big fan of street festivals in general, not because of the gay theme of this particular one.

 

Haha. So, this reminds me of the time I went to an LGBT conference at a nearby college. There were discussion panels, forums, vendors, the whole nine yards. I'm not used to being in scenarios where everything is gay!gay!gay! 24/7. At first it was nice, but after a little while, it got tiresome for me. It wasn't long before I was on what I like to call "an LGBTQRSTUV overload."

Anywho, I'm pretty sure the same thing would happen if I ever went to Pride.

 

I can understand how you are feeling. I have only been out for nearly a month, *been in for most of my life* and I have considered going to the local festival in august in my area. However, I cant help but feel intimidated even know about going simply because I am still in the process of getting used to being out, and still, only my parents know at this point. I have never been a overly social person, I think partly because I always felt isolated by my sexuality.

It really isent a matter of being ashamed so much of a matter as maybe the "out and proud, were here and queer, now deal with it" community might not be the thing you are looking for at this time.

I myself am, like I said, still in the process of coming out, and I do not feel ashamed by who I am, but I still dont think I am ready to try to be apart of the perceived gay crowd. It can be quite intimidating.

I guess it can be considered a peer pressure issue. if you were not comfertable at the pride rally, dont worry about it, you dont have to fit in with the pride rally group to be gay, and be comfertable with yourself. I can see why you could be uncomfertable in that situation, because I am at a point where I would be too.

 

Well don't they? :roflmao:

But, seriously, I think I would be uncomfortable too. We're used to the majority of people being straight and that would just be an unusual environment.