Hello all. I'm new to this. But I feel like I can share without any judgement so I'll just write what's on my mind. Oh and I chose trueLove as my user name because it's the name of a boat on Dawson's Creek, in case any of you wondered, it was the only thing I could think of. I'm 20 and a lesbian. But I'm scared of being a lesbian because I feel like my family will see me differently. I've told my two of my closest friends, and they accept me, but I can't talk to them about what I'm feeling or what I'm going through because they don't understand. I think I haven't felt comfortable talking about it out loud because I have a homophobic uncle and his words are always in the back of my mind. My mom thinks my brother is gay, although he hasn't said anything, she believes he is gay, and she once said that two gay kids would break her heart. After hearing that I could never tell my parents that I'm a lesbian. Even though I'm from LA, and the gay community is accepted, I'm scared of being who I am. I just want to get the confidence to be okay with who I am, and I want to be able to tell my parents and not feel ashamed about it. I'm scared and I feel alone.
If I were you, I would try coming out to a single family member you know would be supportive. Maybe your brother, or your dad. Let them try to help you out through this and then tell your mom and maybe some other family members slowly. It would be hard at first, for sure, but with all the people she knows holding her hand through the way she will come around eventually. I don't know your full situation at home, so I'm not sure what you'd think about this. If your brother really is gay, then he'd almost surely be supportive of you.
Most of us feel this. Right now I'm out for 3 close friends and I still cant belive I came up with the courage to come out. And, yeah, is uncomfortable talk about what I'm coming true with them. They will never understand. And some times I feel really alone. This is when I come up to EC And about your family: I know you will find a way. Coming out for family is one of the biggest problems everybody in here need to face. In my case I think is just out of time. You need to figure out the time you think you should talk openly with them, dont matter if it's now or in 3 years. But as I see you are "new to this", first you need to calm down your thoughts about what is happening with you. It's troublefull need to handle the initial "I'm gay" but you will have that little click and think "yeah, I'm gay" or "I'm gay, it's cool" and laugh about it. You should wait for it before think about talk to your parents. Is the best feeling in the world and anything you think to do about your parents will be way more clear. Well, I expect something I have said help you. Anything you think is uncomfortable to talk I will be glad to hear (*hug*)
Thank you both. You've given me a lot to think about. I'm just scared and trying to get through it one day at a time.
One day at a time is the best way to do it. You can't rush these things. I started with people that I felt would be supportive, and the more support and acceptance I received from people I told, the more confident I became to tell others that I felt wouldn't be as supportive...because I knew I had support to fall back on.
