I love my mother very much but she doesn't understand me. when she meet a female friend of mine she always urge me to have an affair.she knows that i don't like girls even though we hadn't discussed it in the past. what can i do to make her understand without causing her pain. I am very tired of this situation. :icon_sad
Hi there, and welcome to Empty Closets. How long has it been since your coming out? From the little bit you have revealed, it seems that your mom has a hard time accepting that you don't fancy girls, and seems to be in denial. Being in denial is the first stage in eventually, and hopefully, coming around to it, and accepting that you don't like girls. Maybe the next time when it does happen, remind your mom gently that you don't like girls and that it won't change, and see what she says or how she reacts. It might still be painful for your mom but it might help her to start moving towards acceptance. (*hug*)
I think it's best to sit down with her and tell her how you feel ,it won't get better unless you make it. I know you may be scared but I think the best way to deal with it is just tell her. Explain to her that you love her but you can't change and stop liking men. Hope everything goes alright
I quote. When I said to my mom I'm gynesexual, I needed to remind her my sexual orientation lots of time. I suspect your mom would to "prove" your homosexuality to herself. Maybe she don't believe you're gay? And near to a nice girl, you can "change" your sexuality"? (a lot of moms and dads believe in this). So, the next time, tell your mom that you can't change because you're born this way. (*hug*)
Parents often form an ideal vision for how they want their children to grow up. Sometimes when their kids present them with something that challenges that paradigm (such as coming out), they have trouble coming to terms with it. Worse still, they can live in denial and try to force their old paradigm you. It may take your mother some time. The best thing you can do is stay consistent and gently assert your preferences. If you prefer guys, then remind her when she suggests a girl for you. In time, she will come to see your confidence. It can be painful for both parties during a transition such as this. Be patient with her and yourself and things will work out in the end.
