hey everyone, First, I am a lesbian and extremely open about my sexuality, but I haven't come out to my dad yet. My dad is my best friend and I'm terrified of ruining our relationship. I started dating girls when I was in middle school, I dated a girl exclusively for three years in high school, but my dad is unaware of this. I hid everything from him. Right before graduation my ex and I had a falling out and we decided to end things, which led to me trying to date a guy. I dated this guy for two years. I was miserable, but I figured it was within my best interest seeing as I didn't want to hurt my dad. I finally ended things with the boy and met my current girlfriend. We are both college students and live together with 2 other room mates. We've been dating for over a year, have 3 pets together, and are talking about life commitment...but my dad thinks we are best friends. I go to gay clubs frequently. I've been to pride. I'm very open about being a lesbian. My dad knows about nothing. I live a completely different life than my dad thinks I do. Now that things are getting serious with my girlfriend, I feel that I need to come out to my dad. I just don't know how to. I live in the south and my dad is very set in his beliefs about homosexuality. He use to joke around about me being gay in high school, saying that he would love me no matter what..but would add that he thinks it's wrong and that gays are going to hell. I know what I need to do. I just don't know how to do it. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you! PS. My dad introduced me to my girlfriend. They are basically best friends.
I would kiss her when you were around your dad, and make it look like you thought you were alone. Then, he can process the information and come to you when he has had ample time to think about it.
I was in the same situation for a while when I identified as a lesbian. I was totally out and open with everyone but my dad. I made the mistake of telling my mom first and not telling them together. I was terrified of how he would react. I ended up writing him a letter and leaving it for him in the car before a road trip so he could read it and have time to think but I was still right there if he wanted to talk to me. It gets a lot easier once it's all out in the open. If you want him to be a part of your life and your partners it's just something you have to do.
