My mom is usually pretty skeptical about my sexuality, or doesn't want to talk about it; e.g., "We're not having this discussion," "You're not a lesbian," etc. But the other day, we were around a young guy she knew had just gotten out of prison. Later, she said to me, "Don't go out with that guy." A pause, and then: "I mean I know you're ... gay ... but ... like don't hang out with that guy." Like, what???????? Did you actually just SAY IT?????? And then, today, she said, "When you have a guy in your life ... I mean ... when you have ... a significant other in your life ..." Oh my god, major turning point for me.
Sorry, I don't understand what you mean by major turning point... Are you going to do something. Even so, it's obvious your mom is not totally okay with you being the way you are. She needs more time. Also, do you have any other person from your family that is lesbian? Maybe your mom could talk to someone about it, so she can understand a bit of what is being gay/lesbian.
It sounds like your mom loves you and is trying to wrap her mind around a new life view for you. As a mom I can say that I have envisioned my kiddo's future since before she was conceived. I imagine if that view was infant, toddler, pre-school, school, graduation, college, marriage, GRANDKIDS like a lot of people plot and plan for their kids then she hit a bit of a speed bump when you came out. Hopefully she has reset to new plotting out of your future (LOL -or should I call it dream/planning?) that includes a bit more of a nod to your control over your own life. Maybe let her know you noticed and appreciate it? I am really happy for you and I hope it all gets easier for both of you from now on.
Yes, I considered it a major turning point too when my dad said something like "when you find someone" purposely saying someone instead of a man. He usually says, "You should marry a man." I guess they are making progress slowly but surely.
I think her vague acknowledgment of my being lesbian, or anything other than straight, is indeed a major turning point. She's never been even this open to it, and I am happy. Is there more to go? Way more. But I can wait. No, it's rather unfortunate, but I don't have any lesbian friends or family. This is a point of sadness for me. I often feel alone. My mom is one of those people who's never homophobic. Ever. At all. Except when it comes to me! ---------- Post added 24th Jan 2014 at 11:17 AM ---------- And to everyone else: thank you!!!
Hey congrats! I would also consider that a major turning point, it sounds like your mom is accepting you for who you are. Most everyone comes around, it just takes time
Thank you so much! It's exciting for me. ---------- Post added 24th Jan 2014 at 01:24 PM ---------- It was awesome to hear from a parent. thank you.
That would DEFINITELY be a turning point in my relationship with my mother. Glad atleast someone is getting there.
Congrats om that! It seems that she is coming to terms with it and starting to acknowleddge that she was wrong
