I'm stuck in the closet because I'm still too insecure in my sexuality. I sometimes feel like I'm sure that I'm gay, but that feeling is ruined when I see an attractive guy. That feeling is ruined even more when other people tell me that they don't think I'm gay, sexuality is fluid or I'm too young to know. Those are pretty much the only responses I get. I want to come out because I feel lonely. I occasionally talk to my counsellor about my sexuality, but she keeps on telling me that I'm too young to know. My mom just doesn't care, but I suspect she thinks that I'll turn out to be straight. I also talk about my sexuality online, but it isn't the same.
If it's any consolation, 17 is not too young to know. The problem with straight people is that they don't understand what it's about, they can't get their heads around the idea of same-sex relationships. But that's their problem, isn't it?
Your counsellor tells you you're too young to know your sexuality...at SEVENTEEN!? What kind of moron are you talking to...
My dad tells me that as well. I just don't know what he thinks about my sexuality. He teased me about being gay and being attracted to girls, but out of nowhere he says that I'm too young to know.
By this point in your life you are supposed to know (or at least have a solid idea of) what you want to do for a career, how you want to spend your life, what hobbies you enjoy, who your friends are, how to act morally, what you want to study at college/university and so on. If you were completely straight and dating a guy NOBODY would be sitting there telling you 'Woah, hold on DevilKisses! Hold off on dating Ol' Jim over there, you are too young to know you're straight' so with the best will in the world, in this issue you dad either either also a moron, or he is ignorant, or he is both. As for coming out, there is no rule dictating what you have to be out AS. You don't have to come out as 100% unquestionably gay or bisexual or anything else. You can be out as questioning if it helps/ When you see an attractive guy, why should that shake the foundations of your sexuality? Sure, if you're trying to force yourself to be completely 100% gay, then it definitely would do that, so why not accept that the chances are good that you're not completely 100% gay?
I have OCD tendencies. I when I see someone who is attractive I often ask myself if I'm attracted to them. This often causes anxiety and I tend to confuse anxiety with attraction. I also enjoy male attention and kind of get turned on by it. I've had opportunities to kiss guys before. I couldn't even make myself kiss them most of the time. I could make myself kiss a guy once and I didn't enjoy it. I don't know if this means I'm gay or just a prude. What the hell should I call myself if I'm attracted to guys? A bi girl who won't date guys? Doesn't that just sound like denial?
" A bi girl who won't date guys? Doesn't that just sound like denial?" No, it sounds like you have a preference. You don't have to DO anything to anyone to be attracted to them. Think of it in terms of food. You ever watch Man Vs Food and think holy HELL some of that stuff looks good, but then know if you ever tried it you'd flat out die? It's no different.
I was young when I realised I was attracted to girls.. The feeling never changed. Who dare has the right to tell you that you're too young to know!
Then how about "mostly gay"? Or just gay? Some people who identify as gay still find members of the opposite gender attractive, but they gravitate more to dating members of the same gender. Just call yourself whatever makes you comfortable, even if it's something like "not straight", and date whoever you want to, and, well, be happy.
Okay, there was a thread about Tarot, I don't do Tarot but I do I Ching divination. You may believe it or not but I asked for you what you should do in order to figure your sexuality out. I got hexagram called Inner Truth. I believe it means that you have the ability to figure it out, you may even know the answer deep down already. It advises you to be sincere. Let your actions be based on what you truly feel to be right. Be absolutely genuine in all you say and do. (you wanna kiss a guy so kiss a guy. you don't wanna kiss a guy, then don't...) Follow your intuition, your inner hunches. They will not give you an instant answer but they guide every step. Don't rely on anything outside yourself, the result would be confusion so don't listen to others, listen only to yourself! There's also a warning about the importance of not having any prejudice against seeing the truth. If in some part of your being you are hoping/fearing something it distorts your ability to see things as they really are. (so don't fear to be bi) The first hexagram changes into the second hexagram which is called Gradual Progress. It means if you really be true to yourself you'll gradually, step by step, figure it out. :icon_wink