My letter

How does everyone think this is. I'm going away for a month so I'm leaving this as I go.

Dear Mummy and Daddy,

There is something that has been bothering me recently, as you can probably tell. I apologise for my behaviour recently, and I understand that it isn't acceptable, but there's something I need to tell you. Mummy and Daddy, I am gay. I'm sorry, I've asked God so many times what's wrong with me, I prayed for it to be a phase that I would grow out of, but it's not. There have been numerous ideas and attempts to tell you this. The opera I wrote was intended to tell you that, I wrote numerous songs. But I couldn't bring myself to tell you face to face, I'm a coward, I know. I just couldn't bear to see your disappointed faces. I know this will be difficult for you; I don't expect you to immediately accept the fact, as I didn't either. I just need to tell you. If you don't want family to know they don't have to. I just want you to know the truth about your son. Remember when I attempted suicide? That wasn't about all this teacher favouritism nonsense, that was just because I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone my secret. Please don't start to blame yourself, you didn't make me attempt suicide. It's just that if you are brought up in a house and a community where how you feel is wrong, you feel dirty, disgusted and not worthy of everyone and everything around you.
Over the past year or so I started to go through the major questioning stage. I have a number of poems from that period of time. On June 12, I told the first person that I thought I was bisexual (though I knew I was gay). I gradually started to tell more people I was bi, and then the courage grew so that I could tell people I was gay. I had some bad reactions, which is why I haven't told you sooner.
When I got back from Germany and you saw I had been on Stonewall and Coming Out Stories online, you asked me if there was I was confused about, to which I answered completely truthfully, no. I was not confused at that point. I had accepted and acknowledged my sexuality.
I think, however, that you always knew I was gay. My feminism, getting on better with girls than boys and although I had girlfriends in reception and younger years, never really showing an interest in a girl or talking to you about a girl.
To you, homosexuality is wrong. I accept that, and I don't expect that to change, although I disagree completely with the idea that you are possessed or tempted by demons and you are made gay. I was born gay, and there is nothing I can do to change that fact. You aren't bad parents, and you didn't make me gay. I just am gay.
In the end, I'm still your son, the same old son you've always known. I'm still the opera lover, red headed, musical son you know and (hopefully still) love. You just know another thing about me.
And you're still the same parents, and I will understand the way you react, and I am prepared for any possibility.

I love you. I hope you do too.

Your loving son,

William

 

No, they want me to call them that :/