I'm reluctant to come out to my aunt as Trans. I don't know her views on the LGBT or how she reacts to heavy news. Should I come out as pansexual first and see how that goes? Should I even come out to her (extended family and all)... I just don't know. She's awesome and we talk every other week it's just I'm afraid of her feeling let down (she's like a second mom to me). Ughh!
Consider that for a moment, the phrase 'let down'. Like she gave you some sort of opportunity, or felt you had one and encouraged it, and you threw it back at her or didn't even try to make the best of your life. What are you doing if not trying to make the best of your life? To be honest I wouldn't come out as pan first, partly because it's not what you REALLY want to tell her, and partly because I just plain don't see the point. Why don't I see the point? Perhaps because I've never even considered discussing sexuality with anyone other than my immediate family, and the only reason I told them was because I wanted to start dating and thought I ought to give them the heads up. But that's just me, if you feel differently go ahead. As for telling her you're pan instead of telling her you're trans...let's be honest here, if you tell her you're pan and she takes it well, it doesn't mean she's going to take you being trans well. They are massively different in terms of what you have to process. You tell her you're pan and she takes it well, all she will do is accept that you might date a guy or a girl and so on. With trans, even if she takes it well part of her is going to think of you as a different person for a while because that is exactly what it seems like. On the other hand if you tell her you're pan and she takes it badly...well how shitty are you going to feel after that? Now you know that eventually she HAS to find out and you get to repeat it again. I assume you're not planning on changing your mind on your gender based on her opinion, so she will need to know eventually. In the end it's up to you, but I know which one I would go for Either way, good luck!
Can I just say pansexual isn't as easy to explain because it's not wildly understood. I recommend coming out as trans first.
