My brother is starting to frighten me. I really dont know what to do.

Have you tried talking to him about it like outside of the situation when he is actually touching you? Maybe if you told him that it makes you uncomfortable then asked him why he keeps doing it you might gain a better understanding of why this is happening and where he is coming from. I'm not saying he's right at all, and if it does make you uncomfortable to the point of being inappropriate you need to talk to someone, whether he is your brother or not your safety comes first. Ask him why he is doing it calmly without accusation and see what he says. If he denies it or gets hostile then you should seek some help.

All the best, look after yourself ♥

 

Your brother is making inappropriate touches. That is not okay. If this continues, he could do something more than touching. You really do need to tell your mom and if she doesn't listen, then you need to talk to somebody else until you can get this behavior to stop.

 

I agree with above posters--tell your mom, and if she doesn't do anything tell someone else. THIS HAS TO STOP. No one should make you feel uncomfortable, and only people you are okay with touching you can touch you. If you tell him to stop and he keeps doing it anyway...that's REALLY not good. Tell someone. This really needs to stop before it goes any further.

 

You're in Canada: technically what he's doing is assault. I'm sure he (and maybe you) would be shocked to learn that but honest, the legal definition of "assault" here is any unwanted physical contact. On top of that, it could qualify as sexual assault:

(emphasis mine, from http://www.aasac.ca/txt-fact-sexual-assault-abuse.htm)

Of course, telling him or your mother that is probably not going to work out in your favour because likely (from what you've said) they'd be dismissive of it. That being said, I'm awfully surprised you think your mother would scoff because that's the kind of thing I get the impression that parents and mothers especially are kinda sensitive about. I mean hello where's the incest taboo when you need it, right?

If some random 17yo guy were touching you like that, he could get arrested, easy, so the fact that your brother is related to you is not any kind of defence. It's not about what he intends when he touches you; it's about how it makes you feel. Everyone has the right not to be subjected to unwanted touch and frankly your brother is WAAAAAY out of bounds (as others have already said).

Actually, when you talk to your mother (and that's probably where you should start since he's a minor under her care), you might want to bring up how she would react if she heard some random guy were touching you like that. And then challenge her on how the fact that in your case "some random guy" is your brother makes it any different (if she scoffs). It's not like he's a little kid who doesn't know any better: he's nearly a legal adult. He shouldn't be touching ANYONE, let alone a woman, let alone his sister, like that.

 

^ Very well-said, Joey.

 

Thanks...

 

awugh!

whatever! I would not jump to conclusions about this! Insect is something i don't condone but i recently had a girl in my Jr. counseling session who had a similar problem and i told her to get proactive about it when in the end it turned out....well lets just save that for now:lol:

all i can tell you girl is NOT to do anything drastic. First of all, since we are clear as to how u feel about ur brother touching you, have u spoken to your brother about this? Cause if u havn't then you should. Tell him how uncomfortable you fell when he touches you and see what happens. If you ahve spoken to him and he still hasn't done anything, the next time he does, take control. Shuve his hand away, get up and tell him not to touch u again and walk away. Of course you mean not sexually but he will obviosuly pick up between the lines and the body language if your assertive enough.


now, the reason i say this is cuz the girl i was talking to found out after getting her brother into deep trouble and i mean juvenile centre trouble; that her brother was gay and was touching her from a female prospective. he never meant any harm and did know she felt uncomfortable cuz he would touch all he girls at school and they would be ok with it. Now he is in Juvi and everyday is hell for him cuz they beat him cuz they suspect he is gay. He is but he is a closeted person. I even visited him once with my school counseler and the girl and boy can i tell u how much she cried tears for her brother.

and you know...he was kinda cute before the kids in the juvi centre f***ked up his face :O


Alex.

 

Talk to him and if that doesn't make him stop tell your mom because what he is doing is wrong! I know you don't want to tell your mom but you really should tell her, let her know that you are serious because something needs to be done. What he is doing is not right at all and nobody should be touched like that without permission.

 

Good for you!

 

Good for you on that. Be really wary of what he's doing, and report ANY OF IT to your mom, no matter how mild. Because that REALLY shouldn't be happening.
Good luck.

 

run to mom for everything can be pretty annoying. :dry: no offence.

I am glad u spoke to him and got his view, as u said ur gonna wait ti out wich is the SMART thing to do. This way your observation can build u a hypothesis then u will know whether u need to become assertive or just tell ur mom, and if ur mom still don't take u serisouly, talk to your brother again and if he takes u for granted;


girl...u know what to do. 911 is just a phone call away.

 

Good I'm glad you talked to him. If he doesn't stop though you definitely need to tell your mom because he shouldn't be doing what he is doing.