Well, the first domino fell of what I think I can safely assume will be many more to fall. Why am I not surprised. ( Ugh ) I decided to be brave and stupid all at once today. ( Well, I am a guy so no offense to other guys, but brave and stupid is a natural behavior of mine. ) Anyways... I decide to tell a close friend of mine today over afternoon coffee that I am not ‘straight’. I am either bi or gay. It was a close female friend I have known for a while. Nothing personal between us ever, just friends who seem to click socially wise. Well, I felt that if I was going to tell someone in my personal life, she would be my best one. Whoops... I was wrong. She rejected my sexuality issue and me. She disagrees with any sexuality that isn’t between man and woman. So, with little fuss or drama on her part, she decided we can no longer be friends. That the fact I like guys is such a dramatic, life change, critical, all overwhelming thing that it has to effect us being friends. Wow!!! Did not see this one coming. I really thought of all people, she would be the one who would be okay with me. At least my best shot at someone being okay with me. I was so wrong. Oops. However, This first domino to fall may not stay down. Here’s what I think. First, cause I never show any indicators that I am anything but straight, I think all of this came out of the blue like a brink in her face. I think she just got hit too hard, too fast without warning. Secondly, I think it’s possible ( only possible ) that she may like me more than a friend and just have never built up the courage to tell me. This bombshell I dropped on her might make her feel hurt at maybe seeing us as more than friends. Third, I am going to give her a few days before I contact her. Then I will ask her for us to meet and talk again. I will ask her to help me understand why my sexuality issue is an issue with her, including if she has feelings for me beyond friend. She is my friend and a good person. I have to at least try to keep her and if anything, not let her feel hurt over this issue. I am not sure if I will share the sexuality issue with anyone else in my personal life right now. I am worried that the reaction I’ll get will be worst reactions. The dominos will fall harder, one after another.:rolle:
