So I have been considering coming out to a close friend recently because I feel like I need to tell this one person for my own sanity. The thing is, I can't even begin to imagine that conversation. How do I find the right situation? Any definite no's for the place and time? What the hell do I say?
i know how you feel. You dont want to be the only one who knows anymore. Trust me, telling someone for the first time is a great feeling. I wouldnt say there are any no, presay, just use your intuition for when to tell them. If it seems like a bad time, it proboly is. Just dont rush anything.
Just say exactly how you feel. Don't make a big deal out of it and at the same time don't prepare for the best response because you don't know how they'll take it. If they are a true friend then they will be cool with it even if it takes some time getting used to it. Good luck
I agree with the above. Be yourself. You could for example start the conversation by saying that "there is something that I would like to tell you. I'm telling you this because I want you to know the real me. I don't want to hide anything from you. I want to be honest with you" or something similar to that. As for timing and/or place, try to talk to your friend alone, it is going to be a bit easier to come out. You could invite your friend over or meet him/her at a place where you would usually hang out. I know it is hard in particular if you really want to tell someone, but it is also important that you don't rush into it. If you are not sure as to what to say, or how your friend will react, maybe take a few more days. Be prepared for various reactions and for answering possible questions that your friend might have. I hope it goes well for you. Good Luck!
i am in the same situation and dont know what to say how to start it. talk from ur heart and how u really feel and that is the only way u will get through it. i wouldnt rush it but it is hard to really know when the right time will be. prolly when ur friend is talking about guys or relationships of somesort. good luck!
A few tips. Give you guys some alone time to talk about it. Don't make it a big production. "Hey, can I talk to you alone? It's kinda private" is probably the best way. The people you tell will pick up on your cues. If you treat it like a horrible shameful secret that nobody must know, they'll do the same. If you treat it like something personal that you're still working through, and so you'd rather they not tell anybody else just yet, they'll take it that way. The second is much preferable. Explain WHY you're telling them. They're a good friend, you feel comfortable telling them, you don't want to hide things from them, you'd like someone to talk to about it. If you have feelings for this person, please please please don't bring this up now. Keep in mind that you've had...what? years? to come to grips with your sexuality. Your friend may have had a couple minutes. There may be some "no way" or "how do you know" or "you just need to get a boyfried" comments. Don't hold that against them. These are things you probably thought over yourself when you were coming to grips with your sexuality, so don't blame them for being further back. If asked "Well, what can I do?", be honest. Tell them you need to talk about things once in a while. You don't plan on going into any major detail of your sex life, but you'd like someone to chat with about your feelings. At the end of the conversation, unless it went HORRIBLY wrong (and IT WON'T), thank your friend. "Thanks for listening, and thanks for understanding. It means a lot to me. I owe you one. Let me know if you even need to unload about something, too." Lex
You sound EXACTLY like me. I recently came out to my friend I didn't want to do the private thing because i thought it would be kind of awkward somehow we got on the topic of sexuality and i just came out and was like "ya, i think im gay" and they were totally accepting of it I did it in a public place and now it seems surreal that i did it there I just couldent do the "i need to pull you aside and talk to you" I really suggest going where you feel comfortable good luck!
My first time, after the last class of the day, I pulled him aside and asked if I could talk to him privately, and we walked to a deserted hallway, and I just said "I'm gay." One of the greatest moments ever, and it leaves you feeling so good afterwards. I highly recommend you do it.
