Today at school my friends were talking about which game is better W.O.W or L.O.L. So one of them said "World of GayCraft" and the other said "League of Fa:***:ts". This lasted for a couple of minutes. I stood up and left. I have been with one of those friends since grade 3 (Im in grade 7) and the other, since September. Im just wondering if I shouldn't be friends with them anymore. When they talk about this I get angry on the inside and it hurts me. Please help!!:help:
Do they know you're gay? If not, well, maybe you should just state your disapproval if they do something like that again. It's not entirely their fault if the're ignorant.
I think we can make ourselves put up with all kinds of offensive behavior from others because we don't want to feel left out of stuff. In my experience, though, comments like the ones you mentioned will stay with you for life. I remember very little of my school days (aside from a couple of friends in high school), but I'll never forget the moments of humiliation/shame/hurt. If they know you're gay and say stuff like that, you might consider calling them out on their comments, because it sounds like they need some sensitivity training. If they don't know you're gay and you're not ready to come out, you might just tell them that you're fine with people being gay and find the comments of your friends offensive. (They still need sensitivity training..) If none of that works, maybe you need to try to make some new friends. I know that sounds harsh, and only you can know what you're comfortable doing. But I do know (and I learned it later in life) that I don't have room in my life for bigotry or intolerance. (*hug*)
You don't have to completely ditch them as friends. You're in middle school, there's bound to be immature jokes here and there. If they don't know about your sexuality, you can't expect them to be immediately respectful, especially when some LGBT kids actually enjoy using terms like that. If you want, next time you hear them say it, just tell something like "Hey, please don't use that word when I'm around, I can't stand it." Chances are they might ask you why you care, but even then you don't have to outright tell them about your sexuality to explain. I used that phrase to some freshman at my lunch table who were using the f word and I said I took personal offence to that word, but it still didn't click for them until one of my friends told them I was bi. They were clueless as to why I cared up until that point.
Call them out on it. I really don't want to, as I think they already know. One of my friends said at lunch today that "the only thing more of a faggot than CJ is a gay fish." I have no idea where the 'fish' part comes in, but they are sorta homophobic. And the only thing is, the guy that said that I kinda like. The only thing keeping them from just telling everyone I'm gay is the fact that I had crushes on 2 girls in 3rd and 4th grade. And now, I realized that it was only me denying that I had no feelings for girls. But they don't take lying well, and they ask "Why, are you gay? Huh?" Whenever anybody tries to call them out.
