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I need some advice....

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Molgera, Mar 1, 2014.

  1. Molgera

    Regular Member

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    So far I have been very lucky with coming out with my family. At around 13 I was able to come out as bi and a few months ago I figured out I actually am a lesbian. My dad and my older sister have been really supportive and told me that they love me all the same.

    My problem is that I've been in a relationship with a boy since I graduated from highschool. I've tried to break up with him several times since I'm just not attracted to him or any other guy in a sexual way, but he just doesn't seem to get the message. Every time I try to break up with him he convinces himself that we are just going on break and even then he still acts the same as if we still dating. I don't really feel like I'm ready to tell him I'm a lesbian, because I'm afraid and not ready to fully come out to my friends yet. He's the kind of guy who would tell everyone if I did. He knew before we starting going out that I as at least bisexual, but he was convinced that it was just a teenage phase I would growout of. I want to break up with him and move on with my life, but I'm nervous he won't get the message unless I come out to him. :bang:
     
  2. SwimScotty

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    If he still hasn't gotten the hint after you've tried breaking up with him, you might have to put his feelings aside and be blunt to get the message across. You shouldn't have to come out to him for him to get the message. I think your best bet would be to tell him flat-out that you're not interested in dating anymore, ever. If he still thinks you're "just on break," then tell him again. I hate to encourage hurting his feelings, but that might be the only way for him to actually get the message.
     
  3. Molgera

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    Thanks for the advice. I'll try that approach next time. I feel bad since this has been going on for a few months now and it has to stop. Hopefully it won't hurt his feelings too much, but in the long run it is for the best.