New School. New Start.

A few things to try to keep in mind.

* Everybody at the school is in exactly the same spot you're in. They're curious, they'd like to make new friends, they're worried about how they're perceived by others, they're scared to death of rejection, they wish somebody else would make the first move. EVERY SINGLE PERSON IS LIKE THIS. Some of them may feel it more than others, of course, but it's there in everybody. We're all just a bunch of issues and problems wrapped up in human skin. Because of this, NOBODY - no matter how hot, how cute, how smart, or how seemingly self assured - is out of your league.

* There are two main things to remember when it comes to meeting and talking to new people.

1. Find your common ground.
2. Talk - and, even better, ask questions based on that common ground.

So let's take an example. Your first day back, you get into your first class - math, say - and you sit down next to somebody who seems rather friendly. So think - what's our common ground? You're both in the same school. And you're both in this same class. And it's your first day back. There's your common ground. Use it.

"Hi. I always hate the first day back - it's always the slowest day of the year."
"Hi, I'm Luis. This is my first day here. Have you had this teacher before? Is he/she any good?"
"You have any idea where this math class is going to start at? I was at another school last year, and I'm kinda hoping I won't start the year already behind."

* People are pretty much the same all over. The things you look for in a friend are those that they look for in a friend. So the best way to make a friend is to be a friend. Be positive. Smile. Introduce yourself. Sound friendly. Don't just fake an interest in what others say - actually BE interested in what they say. You don't have to necessarily be interested in the topic, per se, but be interested in their interest. You may not want to see the movie he's talking about, but appreciate the fact that he loved it that much. Don't worry too much about how you're coming across. If you keep upbeat and keep interested, that should be more than enough.

* Some people won't want to talk to you when you do - they may be preoccupied with things, or feeling antisocial right then. If you get that feeling from someone when you reach out to them, try not to take it personally. Remember that you feel that way sometimes, too. Leave them be, and maybe hit them up again some other day. And find someone new to talk to now.

* You won't "click" with everybody. Each person has a sort of natural spot you can progress to. Some might just be "school chums" that you talk about class with before the teacher comes in, but you can't really be good friends with (since you don't have much else in common, or just don't mesh). That's fine. Don't try to push it. We all need casual acquaintances in our lives in addition to friends. Keep looking, and keep an eye peeled for someone you DO mesh well with. Focus your energies in that direction.

* Practice does make perfect. You'll make a few fumbles, find yourself saying the wrong thing once in awhile, or whatever. It happens. People are actually very forgiving about this sort of thing - they tend to forgive and forget right away, so don't obsess about it. Laugh it off - "I meant MY name is Luis, not YOURS. Sorry. Gah, don't know where my mind is today." You'll get better at it as you go along.

Good luck.

Lex

 

I think sometimes it comes with experience.
One of the things that helped me was a new perspective. Someone told me that I shouldn't let life just happen to me...like there were a lot of people I thought had such reputations and I had to just mingle with the people and hope I am accepted.

But if you think more positive, like "I think Im pretty cool and I like this and that and I'm going to just waltz right into the lunch room and those suckers will have to deal with me." and there will be people that like how you're calm and collected. And you can strike up a good conversation. Just sit down and really listen to what they're talking about and see if you can just say something that's not offensive but insightful. And no matter how they take it , it was just your opinion and you meant it from the heart.

I am also on the AcDec team. I have to come up with a lot of ridiculous speeches and keep a straight face. It's a lot of fun and it helped me learn to relax and make some good friends. I dunno if you're school has one or if your interested, but it's pretty cool. You don't have to be smart either, because they need varsities too. (like me :badgrin

hope this helps.

 

A new school is a big step in social life. I regard it (not to sound so cliché) as a clean slate. You can be whoever you want to be at a new school, and you can be yourself. There's no one their with a background on you who can judge you right away--you're not stuck with everyone thinking of you as you were when you were younger. People change. It's a fact of life.
So enjoy this freedom. There's going to be someone out there who likes you for just you. Approach people. Don't be nervous--as Lex said, everyone's in the same boat. And don't be too paranoid--it feels like everyone is looking at you all the time--trust me, they're not. Everyone's worried, and everyone's paranoid that they look weird, that they have last year's hairstyle, whatever, and they aren't thinking about other people like, "Oh, he's weird. Look, he has a weird face on. Oh, he's a new kid." No. It just doesn't work like that.
And honestly, there are really nice people everywhere. There will probably be someone who will walk up to you and say, "Hi, I'm ____. You must be the new guy. What's your name?" And it's an easy conversation flow after that.
That's my two cents, but honestly, follow Lex's advice. The guy always gets a jump on me and beats me to it :lol:. Takes the words right out of my mouth.
Well, good luck, Luis!

 

Well, it's not really a tip, but sometimes it's best to just jump in. I'm really nervous in those kinds of situations too, but I find just going in and acting natural makes me realize it's not a very big deal after all. There's nothing that makes you more nervous than speculating and worrying about the future.

 

I have a friend, she was new to my school, last year. At the end of the year, she was easily one of the most popular kids in my grade. How did she do it?!?!

The secret of her success? She was comfortable with who she is, thus making her confident in who she is. If you have self-confidence, people will be able to see that, and more often than not, people will approach you. Then, the second part, is that she wasn't afraid to meet new people, talk to new people. She has friends from every clique, not just the big ones.

Sure, she has people who hate her, because they find her over-confident and cocky, but that group is small.

So, to sum this all up. Be yourself, have confidence in yourself, and don't be afraid to take the first step.

 

think that u will just meet a bunch of new kids during your first hours and u can go from there and go up to them at lunch and ask to sitbnext to them. Hell, some people are so outgoing they will ask u to sit next to them. Luck to ya

 

Im am exactly the same way, if i know u i wont shut but if i dont know u u prob. wont hear me talk, atleast not to u. idk y im like this but at the moment i have no problem qith it cuz i guess im fine with the friends i have right now