Me and my friend have been in contact for over 12 years, we talk between 3-6 hours daily on average, sometimes more. We have had no gaps in our contact, it is daily and has been for all of the 12 years. We are both girls, I've just turned 24 and she is a little older. On the days we dont speak, we both get depressed and full on breakdown! We are going to move in together, my Mom already knows this and I feel she assumes we are in a relationship. It was my friends idea to move in together, she also begs and damn pleads with me to stay with her at her house when we say our goodbyes. When we were teens, we would often bombard eachother with messages for example: 'i love you' 'i adore you' 'please let me marry you'. These messages stopped but we carry on being affectionate towards eachother. I dont want to embarass myself or her and I dont want to come across as a creep, I have this feeling if I told her how I feel, it will either destroy our friendship or strengthen our bond forever, one of either extremes. I am not sure I have the confidence for a physically intimate relationship, and this is another reason I am scared of telling her. Can you have a romantic partnership without the intimacy? I want to 'secure' her into my life forever. For her to be only my friend, even though its lasted a lifetime already, it is not enough. I want her to belong to me and me to her. How on earth do I tell her how I feel?
As you're very close and have been friends for a long time, it sounds like it would not destroy your friendship! Maybe she feels the same way as you and is too scared to tell you? I'd tell her how you feel, as it sounds like she could possibly feel the same way! Hope all goes well!
I agree with BrightEyes. Tell her how you feel. You've known and loved each other for twelve years! I would be shocked if there's anything you can tell her that would turn her off you, let alone surprise her. If you're truly worried about it, express that feeling to her. You two know each other like no one else.
I agree with the above. But if you're not sure, it is always good to test the waters a bit. Try and figure out how she feels about homosexuality/bisexuality. If her thoughts are positive, great! If her thoughts are negative, it still shouldn't destroy your friendship, she should just be taken aback. You already have such a tightly knit friendship, I would be surprised if such a simple thing as homosexuality would rip it up.
I agree with all the fine comments above me. You have such a strong bond, there's literally nothing in the world that can break it up. Have faith and confidence in each other and in your friendship! 12 years is a long time. If you are attracted to her, it's hardly going to be a small attraction. Let it out there, and let her know. For friends that talk for so long, I'm sure you have a pretty good idea of what her views on homosexuality is. If she's accepting, go for it. She may be surprised, but a friend like that would probably be flattered Cheers!
Hi! Thank you so much for your advice, all of you. You're all very sweet people, I am shocked as usually forums can be a bit hostile, well I'm glad this one is so friendly!! I m going to try and tell her, it might start off a little cryptic and hinted, but I'll get there. If I do manage soon, I'll be sure to let you all know how it goes....
