No one knows about me yet and I think I should tell them but I don't know when I should. Should I tell my friends first, my family, or just come home one day with a dude and be like "oh hey yeah this is me" and then bam??? Any comments helping me about this would be helpful.
Forget what you 'should' do, or more accurately, stop trying to tell yourself there are things you 'should' do, because their aren't. If you 'should' do something, there is implied obligation. You aren't obligated to tell anyone anything, you do it to stop them saying something stupid later. With that in mind, ask yourself this. Who do you WANT to know?
I agree with Ellia, do what you feel is right and not what u "should". I'm not out yet and I don't intend to go out until I get my own apartment
Ellia pretty much summed it up. If you don't want to come out or feel like you need to, don't do it. Come out on your own terms and once you're ready to do so. Don't beat yourself up about this!
I agree, you should come out on your own terms. I'm not completely out of the closet either, I've told most of my friends and one family member. I told my second oldest brother cause I'm closer to him and I figured he would understand and not judge me. He actually has met one of my friends. He just stated, that I don't owe our family or anyone an explanation. That made me feel really good that I was able to share and tell him. I even purchased a book called Outing Yourself, it was helpful but again I think it's should be up to you, when and how you come out.
There is no set way of coming out, but do think about it carefully. I don't know how old you are or if you still live at home with parents, but do think about how they will react. If they are likely to go off like a bomb at the news you might want to hold off telling them until you have somewhere else to go/live. I've heard too may stories of kids telling parents and then being rejected or thrown out. I don't think it's worth living through hell or being out on the street for. Think about the people who will react best and maybe tell them first (to build up a support network, in case others react badly). You may need a good support network. When you tell your parents (or anyone really), try to do it in a calm way. Sometimes it gets blurted out in an argument and I don't think that's really a good way to do it. We shouldn't set out to hurt people with the news. Just my thoughts.. hope they make sense and help a little.
Personally, I told friends individually. However, for parents I'll probably just be all "btdubs I have a boyfriend." But whatever seems least awkward and most likely to be accepted is the one to take. It's your personal route and story.
