Hi everyone, I'm new to this forum. Basically I'm sort of regretting coming out, mainly to my mom. I kind of accidentally told her I was gay in a text message when I was drunk a few months ago and now she's gotten all weirdly obsessive about it. But she keeps pressuring me to tell my dad and my brother and sister. But really I have pretty bad social anxiety and all the times I've come out have been an accident, my friends found out when I told them when I was drunk as well... Overall the whole thing has been making me really uncomfortable and stuff. It's like now there's a weird pressure for my life to make some big turnaround and that I'll get into a nice relationship and everything, but really if the past is any telling of my future the forever alone route is where I'm heading :lol: I know it seems weird but I just kind of regret telling anyone, it's given me unnecessary attention and I feel like it's made my friendships a lot more awkward as well. I don't really have a specific question, just kind of wondering if anyone else has ever felt like this before.
Yes, as I have been in the same situation as you are. Only one very close friend used to know about my sexuality, and that was because I told them in a very personal way and I knew I could trust them. I told one of my more casual guy friends I was bisexual when I was on a drinking spree with him. And I really regret telling him, mostly because I wanted other people to know first. (I did not tell my family, nor my other very, very close friend) I regret telling him something so personal while being drunk, because I had no reason to tell him and I told him in such an unpersonal way. Now I just sense him tensing when I talk about females and it just gives me undesired attention. It's just like there's some big elephant in the room when I'm hanging out with him.
Hey mate, I've felt the same way before. When I first came out to some of my adult friends, I felt like there was this awkwardness between us, and I agree with you - it can create some awkwardness. For that reason, I don't come out to people unless someone really needs to know, and when I do come out to them, I try to make it as nonchalant as possible. The way I handled the awkwardness created between some friends and I was to give it time. After some time, about two months, I realized that my sexuality is not as big of a deal in our friendship as I was making it, and that honestly, most people are probably more concerned with themselves and won't dwell on the day I came out to them. I realized that it was me creating the awkwardness, and if I just accepted it and moved on, things would be much smoother between the friends and I. And things are much smoother now. I sometimes feel awkward, but hardly ever. I'm not saying that you're making this a bigger deal than it is, but just keep that in mind. If you show that you don't care, your good friends will see that and treat you normally.
Well I told my friends about 2 years ago, was just my mom that's fairly recent. I just think it's going to be incredibly awkward if I actually do inevitably start dating and meet someone and introducing them to friends and such just cause they're not used to seeing gay people really. Same with parents, that's kinda why I don't really want them to know, I'd probably have a panic attack if I ever had to introduce a date to my parents lol
