Coming out to a Catholic?

"I haven't though because they are Catholic (they live in a European country)... and we all know what that means. "

No, we don't.

I know gay catholics, I know catholics who support LGBT people. I know the pope is trying to change the churches stance on gay marriage.

Can you safely tell them? Sure. There is a chance they won't take it well, which is ultimately their problem, you're just down one shitty friend.

Basically, this part of you isn't going away, your friends will either accept it or they won't. If they do, great, no problem, if they don't at least you don't have to waste your time and energy trying to be friends with someone who can't accept who you are.

 

I also think them living far away could help. If they don't mind, you're still good friends. If they do, you don't have to see them again and they're probably too far away to have any impact on your life.

Also, as mentioned, LGBT views vary widely with Catholics. I can only think of 4 Catholic people I know. They're all teenagers and at least 3 of them are raised Catholic and not particularly religious. Anyway, all of them are accepting of gay people, friends with gay people, one of them is gay, and at least one is considering practicing Catholicism more now that the pope seems to be changing the church's attitude.

 

Which European country we are talking about? I had/have friends nearly all around Europe and so far non was homophobic. I don't know their religious belief mostly tho' as I am not interested in how they reach the God. Faith is between person and God.

 

I'll answer these questions because I feel comfortable answering these. In other words, I got lectured my mother when she pulled out the Catechism and read a passage about how the church views homosexuals. Keep in mind that she read from a Catechism that was published right around John Paul II's time.

In the Catechism, it states that homosexuals are to be loved just as ordinary people but are to remain celibate; however, like I said that was from Pope JP II's time and Pope Francis is slowly trying to change the view. Catholics about have the same view as Christians toward homosexuals but Catholics are more opposed to homosexual acts than the homosexual.

I tell you to tell only if you feel comfortable with doing so. If you want to read up on the Catholic view on homosexuals, you can probably find a Catechism to find this view. I would read the most recent Catechism published.

 

You asked if Catholics are anymore or less opposed to homosexuality than Christians..well..Catholics ARE Christians.

I am Catholic, very devout, and raised in a very devout Catholic family. Of course, my family believes that homosexuality is a sin, but they have never shunned anyone, my family respects everyone they come across, everyone in my family has gay friends, now when I came out, I was a little nervous, obviously like most people are. What really let me know that NO ONE in my family has a problem with it was when my 85 year old grandmother, who has always gone to Mass, I go to Mass with her every Sunday said "Well, if that's what you want, then that's what you want."

A friend of mine at church is also gay, he told his family, same reaction, they didn't care.

Most Catholics, are not going to care, they may think it's a sin, but they will be your friend and they will respect you. There are very few that won't and would be hateful about it.

 

@RedDev84 - I'm not Catholic, but...

I have friends who are Catholic and very, very tolerant. Yes, they love their Church BUT they don't agree with everything it says. It's pretty much the same for me with the Church of England... I love my Church, attend regularly, but disagree with it on a number of issues, particularly same sex marriage. Sometimes you have to change things from within though.

Spain and Portugal are devout Catholic countries, but they legalised same sex marriage with huge public consent a few years ago. The Republic of Ireland is heading in the same direction it seems. I think Italy may take a while longer.

Pope Francis has already said that he wants to see less judgement from the Catholic Church and more pastoral care of people and a few Popes before him (Pope John Paul the First) did a lot of work to support gay people. Before he became Pope, John Paul 1 made a speech to Cardinals in which he said:

“The day is not far off when we will have to answer to these people who through the years have been humiliated, whose rights have been ignored, whose human dignity has been offended, their identity denied and their liberty oppressed. What is more we will have to answer to the God who created them”

It didn't receive a great reception, but the same Cardinals made him Pope a short time later.

I think those words summarise the feelings of a great many Catholics (and non-Catholics too, I might add).

 

That is the view. Easier said than done, though. Most urban educated Catholics generally wouldn't care, in either North America or Europe, unless they're in a suburb or out in the country and making a lot of babies and home schooling them to make sure the kids aren't exposed to today's "evils." In the latter reference, I'm referring to North America.

---------- Post added 22nd Mar 2014 at 06:06 PM ----------

Word. I always find this to be nonsense so people can make a mountain out of a mole hill.

---------- Post added 22nd Mar 2014 at 06:07 PM ----------

Yes and yes.

 

Don't worry too much about it. It's not unusual to set a date/time and then find yourself unable to do it. Coming out to people is not an exact science. Don't give up.

 

You cannot stereotype a person strictly by their religion...Their actions are far more relevant in this scenario. I am Catholic and my parents are somewhere in between Christian and Catholic. They are completely opposed to homosexuality. However I have many Catholic, Mormon, Jewish, and Christian friends who have no problem whatsoever with my orientation. That being said I also have some religious and atheist friends who are very opposed to homosexuality. So ultimately it comes down to the individual, not their religion.

 

I don't know about Catholics in Europe but my former partner's parents are Catholic (ohio USA) The Catholic church is similar to many other mainstream religions in that they consider homosexuality a sin. And just like many other religions, the members of that religion don't march lockstep with everything the church puts out. We were so scared to come out to them, but it went really well, much better than my parents. My parents and my aunt and uncle are both the same religion but my mother had a meltdown and her sister was understanding. Not exactly approving, but not condemning either.

 

Don't worry to much about your friends being Catholic. As others have said in this thread it's a stereotype that all Catholic's are homophobes, my grandma grew up Catholic and bears no ill will towards gays. She is actually very vocal in support for the gay rights movement, But at the same time a life long Catholic. But in the end only you can make the choice if you want to tell them or not. I hope everything goes well whatever you decide

 

Hey there
I myself am Catholic and a lesbian. Don't believe the stereotype that all Catholics are bigots, because stereotypes are often untrue. That being said, I would bring up the topic beforehand and maybe get an overview of the persons beliefs. If they are as nice a person as you say they are, then I'm sure that they won't be homophobic. But do be careful, as many Catholics are opposed to homosexuality, so ask their opinion on gay marriage etc before you do anything drastic.
Hope I was helpful x

 

Mmmm I see your problem....
Maybe bring up the fact that gay marriage has just been legalised in England? Or if you watch any tv shows with lgbt people in them, maybe bring it up by casually mentioning that they're gay or bisexual etc? Like Neil Patrick Harris from How I Met Your Mother or Zachary Quinto from Star Trek or even Ellen Degeneres. And then gauge their reaction.
If they ask why, just say that you were just curious or you had a discussion about it with someone earlier.
Helpful?