I feel like I'm suspended in a glass gaol. I'm trapped, but every can see me exposed. To put things bluntly, I'm in a dangerous position at school with my orientation. My close female friend is a very touchy feely person and we mess around a lot at lunch. Someone snapped a photo while we were hugging closely and it looks like we're snogging. She thought it was hilarious and put it on the internet. My friends also thought it was hilarious and have started openly shipping us, making comments if we touch each other, etc. I did not find it hilarious at all but struggled to communicate this without giving away my orientation. In fact, only one of my friends could tell that it was making me feel bad. The thing is, whenever someone makes a comment like "you two are so queer" I sort of say nothing, because I don't want to lie. She has a boyfriend so everyone knows she's just being silly but I think some are wondering about me. The last time someone said "you guys are so queer" I quietly said "no I'm not" but everyone refuted me "don't even try to deny it" "yeah right" and I felt so small. I don't want to lie about my orientation because one day I might want to come out to these people, I don't want to admit to being queer because a) I will destroy a friendhsip and b) I'm truly not ready to handle being out at school. A catch 22. Please help me. I don't know what to do.
Yawn. I'm serious. Yawn. You are being picked on (small bullying) and the "joke" will only be funny and continue if you seem upset by it. If you just yawn when someone brings it up and cooly say "are you still going on on about that?" then just change the topic to something else (upcoming math test, something you saw on tv, a new song by a group everyone is interested in, etc.) Be BORED by their childishness. Fail to notice them. Let it slide like water off a duck's back. They will tire of it soon enough on their own. Good luck to you.
