I think I\\\'m gay but im not sure, Ive read some stuff saying that it could just be cos im still a teenager... I experimented a bit when I was younger, confused a lot about whether it was right or not :/ There\\\'s a couple of guys I really like, but I don\\\'t think i can have them. They both act gay only to me, but one of them is also REALLY flirting with my lesbian ex. Complicated, huh? So what do I do? I really need someone, if only to see where im orientated oh well. Any help appreciated btw, i can\\\\\\\'t get on here very often, I haven\\\'t come out to my friends cos im not sure yet; can\\\\\\\'t get on here at home and i think it\\\'s blocked at school anyway...
Yeh, it's a big decision, especially when your a teenager and you've got people saying different things left, right and centre I did the same as you, and read the thing that said 'hero worship' or whatever. My answer to that was, just to wait, if you grow out of it great=) good for you, if you don't then obviously you're gay=) You're constantly changing as you grow up, hell even once you're grown up (from what I've heard=P) The key is just to be you and then you'll see what happens=)
If you ask me (and I'm kind of stubborn and opinionated), there's no such thing as a 'gay' phase, where you think you're gay and turn out straight. There's no rush to figure out your sexuality. You don't get a medal for figuring it out, that's the truth. You also don't get a medal for coming out to everyone, that would be awesome, but sadly, no medals for us. Find someone you feel comfortable talking with---a teacher, a parent, a friend, a neighbor, etc. And talk to them, ask for their help and their support. Oh, and Welcome to EC!
You can use a proxy server to get past school blocks but if your not sure what you are it might not be the best idea to be on this site at school.
Welcome to EC! There's a lot of people who go through this. The basic advice is "don't rush". Don't feel the need to hang out a shingle and announce your sexuality to the world. Just play it by ear, date if you'd like, fantasize about whatever you feel like. And eventually, the picture will start getting clearer. Lex
Hi and welcome to EC! Don't rush into labeling yourself. Over time you will figure it out. Follow whatever feels right. Sexual identities can change over time. You might be having these feelings currently but you might still develop other feelings as well. What I would suggest, is take it one step at a time. First, try to figure it our for yourself. Once you are sure, take the next step. Try coming out to friends, build a support network. I would worry about a boyfriend or having a relationship with someone later. I don't think trying to find a boyfriend, just to see how you are oriented, is going to be fair on your potential boyfriend or on yourself. What I mean here is that you should not "experiment" with other peoples given that they also have their own feelings and yes, insecurities. Place yourself also in the shoes of your potential boyfriend and ask yourself if it is really fair on him. However, it will also not be fair on you. You might end up hurting yourself a lot more than someone else. My best advise would be to start figuring it out yourself first. Talk to others, such as a counselor about your feelings. Take one step at a time. Figuring it all out can take a while, but if you take it slow, you will be able to get through this a lot better and perhaps easier than if you try to go too fast. Hope this helps!
Yeah i'd say don't rush...but hey PM me sumtime and we can talk...i've been thru a lot of stuff liek you and i just dont wanna post it all. So if you want just hit me up and we'll talk. Good luck hun.
Welcome to EC It's a last here. All i cn really say is don't experiment to find out your orientation. It'd really just end badly for the both of you. The more you can log on the better really. this placed really helped me out and a lot of other people. As before said proxy sites can be used at school and why can't you log on at home? All the best.
There are many places and leaflets which say "You're just a teenager and you're probably having a gay phase". For some people, this may be true. But remember that these things say that to everyone - gay or not - they're just generic advice to try and "calm" confused teens down. They cannot tell you whether you're really gay or not, only you can discover that. So take them with a pinch of salt, because they're massive generalisations. If you feel worried about whether it's a phase, just remember that it doesn't matter either way. Explore what you feel and be true to yourself and things will pan out OK. Good luck!
