I really want to come out to my closet guy friend today because it just feels like the right time and I'm home alone for a few hours so I can react however I want. I'm just a little confused on how to word it (I want to text him). I have two main concerns. First off, we used to date a few years back. Debatably it was kiddie relationship but we still kind of hold each other in a special place because of our connection and I don't want him to think I was bearding when I was with him, because I didn't even realize my sexuality back then. Secondly, I have lied to him a lot by omission which gives me a lot of guilt, just from the fight back in January with my French teacher about gender identity and participating in the day of silence but never saying why I was so vocal about everything. In short I guess I don't want him thinking that I was using him. I don't want to hurt him. I know the only negative reaction I would get out of him would be from shock because he's also rather vocal about lgbt rights too. I'm thinking of texting him and being like "Hey can we talk? ... I haven't been exactly truthful with you lately but I didn't want to hurt you or anything" and then tell him. Would that work? Any words of encouragement?
I would leave out the 'I haven't been truthful part' of that text. Just say you need to talk and then tell him that in person
Yeah, I'd come out to him first and see how he reacts, then you can apologise if you feel it's necessary but I think the chances are it really won't be.
I think you should go for it. He sounds like the kind of guy who would be perfectly ok with it. But like the others said, don't apologize for who you are. If he asks about your previous relationship with him just tell him the truth, you weren't sure of your orientation yet, and that whatever you had wasn't a lie. I think he'll be completely understanding. Best of luck!
