situation K. Imma make this short and sweet. I almost come to terms on my sexuality. But not yet, because my home where I currently am, the people around me are small minded and are kinda isolated, don't live in a city nor have that live and let live mentality. Friend But the city where I am currently residing in and hoping to permanently call my home has new friends and faces, and I have a lesbian friend out there, she is awesome and fun to hang out with, and she seems to be the only one I actually want to come out to first, but not sure exactly what that will do for me, I am sick and tired of living my life trying to be a "cool" straight guy who needs to hold back who he is because to make others feel comfortable, most of the time it doesn't even work. Coming out She knows some people I do know and who she would tell,(because I certainly do not want to stop her either and she would break the news better) she knows none of my family or anything for the news to actually do any damage. She won;t turn her back on me because she is so damn comfortable with her self and sexuality. I also feel she would kinda help me ease into it. I am gay, I like women as well, but I haven't had a date in a long while, and I mean LONG while. Internal Struggle I know I am gay and would be happy out, but my mind is totally still ignorant in the part of I do not see myself as appealing to dudes, to chicks I would be a typical big fun guy to be out with, but I just do not see myself appealing as a gay.(See? Ignorant mind, ignorant statement) I always picture gays as skinny and cute, I am neither that, I guess I just need to embrace self worth. And do not know how to act as myself if I am gay, but yet wanna be masculine enough to be a man, well, my idea of a man anyway. lol Question I have a supportive friend, I am isolated from my family and those who knew me from home, I am somewhere I am happy and have a new beginning. Should I just do it if it means feeling free from my mental and oppressive person? I am leaning towards doing it. Just need a second opinion. Thanks for reading.
Sounds like you're in the right place at the right time. You have been gay all your life so you don't have to act any differently when you come out. If women find you attractive many men will as well.
Thanks, dude. Well, I never really 'acted' myself, just held it back. Now it will be weird, but it does kinda seem like right place, right time, doesn't it?
Lol. That is what I was thinking too, sometimes I have a tendency to whenever I feel comfortable in a social situation, I get too comfortable and actually kinda lose myself in the moment. lol. I certainly do not want to make people to think that I'm super gay and annoying at the same time. I am just learning to take things slowly at a time.
Nope, sorry I have not responded to this. Lol. This maybe a little late, but I am back at home for the time being, I did not tell her because I wanna do it in person and we never seen each other yet. I am gonna be at home for quite sometime before I go back and try to find my new home. :\ High hopes tho. And no Easter baskets, lol. I didn't even get anything for Easter, too old for it, I guess. Haha.
Trust me JohnB, we're not all skinny, cute boys and we're not all attracted to that look either. Personally, I like my men to be men :icon_wink I think a lot of us struggle with perception of what it is or what it means to be gay and we reckon it will change us in a big way. To be frank, it's a load of bull. The only changes will be the one's you allow. Yes, you'll feel more relaxed about yourself (I hope) but there will be no earth shattering events as a result of embracing your sexual orientation. If now feels the right time, go for it!
Hiya. I guess the main thing is that you are doing it for you. If you are comfortable with yourself and feel coming out would be good for you and not have any detrimental effects on you then by all means, I'd say go for it. Of course, the choice is yours, but being out if you can be can surely be liberating and take a certain weight off of your shoulders. Happy days
Thanks for the encouragement. Gosh bless. ---------- Post added 18th May 2014 at 01:13 AM ---------- Lol. I know about the look, it is just who I eyed on buses and stuff. But in seriousness, thanks for the reassurance.
THE REAL QUESTION IS.... Should you come out ever?!?!? or should you never!?!?!? idk if that made any sense i just wanted a rhyme.
Yeah I used to think like this a lot. Having attention from girls always flattered me but I never had any from guys and I used to worry that what girls look for in guys is different to what guys look for in guys. But I don't think this is true, I think everyone has their type and just as there are straight girls who like different type of guys, so there are gay guys who do too. Now I worry more that even though some guys might like me, that I'm hard to approach. If I saw someone like myself I'd be intimidated to start flirting with them because there's not much to give me away as gay and I'm sort of bigish. I mean there's no way I'd go up to a guy bigger than me and ask them if they're gay in case they kicked off, and I wonder if people think this about me On telling your friend I'd say it definitely sounds like a good idea and I hope you manage to!
Maybe you need to try some of the easier to spot external cues, such as a rainbow bracelet, dog tags, or ring, or a "message" or tie-dyed T-shirt. That way, they can find YOU are advertising and open, if they find you appealing.
