1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

When is it the right time to come out?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by oliro, Apr 20, 2014.

  1. oliro

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2014
    Messages:
    53
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I am 13, and don't think that it is the right time, because I don't feel comfortable telling anyone.:help:
     
  2. Trentacles

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2014
    Messages:
    220
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    Take your time mate. If i've learned anything it's not to rush things. If you don't think the time is right, then it probably isn't.
     
  3. oliro

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2014
    Messages:
    53
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    How did u come out?

    ---------- Post added 20th Apr 2014 at 06:37 PM ----------

    I really want to tell someone though, I just don't know who I can trust.
     
  4. Trentacles

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2014
    Messages:
    220
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    It was very messy. My mum found gay porn on my laptop. She confronted me and i felt cornered so I admitted to it. I broke up with my gf and told a few people I trusted from swimming and they kind of let the cat out of the bag and now i think everyone at school knows. It was a span of like 4 days and I'm still kind of freaking out about everything.

    Definitely take things slow.

    ---------- Post added 21st Apr 2014 at 03:10 AM ----------

    Yeah thats the thing. I thought I could trust some people because they were fine with one of our mates being gay. i mistook being accepting for being trustworthy. It was my mistake there. It you don't want it to get out, make absolutely certain they can be trusted. To be fair it was only one of the people I told who said anything but that was all it took
     
    #4 Trentacles, Apr 20, 2014
    Last edited: Apr 20, 2014
  5. BryanM

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2013
    Messages:
    2,894
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Columbia, Missouri
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Oh lord, this brings up memories of how I was a few years ago. I was in the exact place you were. Well to start off, if you don't feel comfortable with telling anyone yet, it is likely you are still trying to accept the reality yourself. If you have accepted it, you're further ahead at your age than I was at 13. Make sure to take your time and go at your own pace, and to make sure you're ready to be out, because once you get the ball rolling on the coming out process, it is extremely hard to stop and backtrack. If you want to talk to a trusting adult, a school teacher or counselor you trust a lot is a good start. Depending on where you live as well, they may be forced to keep it a secret until you give them permission to tell people. So if you really need to tell someone, I would start there. If not, just come out when you're ready.