So i have currently come out to only a couple really close friends. So far the reactions have been great and they have been very supportive. I want to tell my family but i am concerned about my dad. He is very conservative, and i don't know how he will take the news. Its possible he will be okay with it, because I know he works with a few gay guys, but other times when i hear him actually discuss the matter he is really stand-offish and isn't really able to talk about it much. I am going off to university in the fall in a different province (6 hours away), so I'm not sure if i should tell him before i go, or wait until after I have been away for a while. I just need some help.
To what extent will you rely on your Dad for ongoing security (okay, money) while you are at Uni? Many young people, like you, need ongoing support from parents to get them through Uni and a home to return to during holidays, so I'm just wondering if you might 'burn your bridges' with him if he takes the news badly. Just a few things to consider. Good that you are building up a network of supportive friends as these are people you can turn to if things go wrong when you tell your Dad. If you can increase your support network, to include some family members, all the better. Often, the best time to come out to conservative parents is when we are strong and independent and no longer need their support in life. Sometimes, they can surprise us and react better than expected, but it's always an unknown. What do you think?
While he will be paying some of the tuition, i would be able to pay for it if absolutely needed. I don't know if I could really wait till after though, 4 years is a long time. I am working towards telling some of my family, i just don't want it to get back to my dad right now. Thank you for the response.
If you think you can manage and have good support around you, then I would tell him to get the weight off your mind (maybe once you are 18 though). It might go down badly at first, but he might be okay or come around in time. As long as you are prepared for that and have people to lean on, do it. Have a look at some of the resources and similar discussions on here for hints/tips on how to come out. Sometimes, it can smooth choppy waters if we approach it in a certain way. Best of luck with this and uni.
