Hello, I'm looking for some advise if I should come out at home... *A little background: When I was younger I had slowly come to an understanding that I liked girls. It's sad to think I felt something was wrong with me and I wasn't "normal". Now that I'm older I understand I shouldn't worry about other people's judgments. I know most of my friends assume I am bisexual or lesbian. Starting from elementary, I have had friends ask me if I was into girls and I would have denied it. Today, I have a few friends who are openly bisexual, gay, or lesbian. I'm not really worried about coming out to them. My mom did ask me last summer when I was doing an online health course if I like girls and guys.* I'm worried about coming out to my family. I don't want them thinking it's a "phase" or something. Even though my mom is religious, she doesn't seem to have anything against anyone who is LGBT and on her sport team some women are lesbians. My brother and sister could go any way. I've been dropping hints to my brother lately. My dad though... I hear the way he talks about some of the women on my mom's team who are open about it. He says stuff like "... I don't think it's natural." or "Why do they have to be so open about it?" and just stuff that makes me feel upset, I guess. He's not religious or anything. I don't feel comfortable with only telling my mom, because I know she will feel like she needs to tell someone anyway. Another thing I am afraid of is, will this get me kicked out of the house? My dad thinks he can make all the decisions and tell everyone what to do because he is "the man" and it's "his house" so no one is allowed to argue with him. We definitely don't get along. There's a lot of painful things already, and I'm afraid he will use me coming out as an excuse for getting rid of me. Or if he doesn't kick me out, then he will make fun of me or use that over my head in some way for the next 3 years. I kind of feel like I'm over thinking all this though. I'm the type of person who tells people "We have one life, so live it" or "Just be yourself", I feel like a hypocrite if I don't be myself. I would love to be out with everyone and able to experience dating in high school, dances, and stuff. I have read on other sites that it is better to wait till college or until I can support myself. That would be at least 3 years, which will be when I'm 18. *Sorry if this seems rant-ish. I just want to make sure to get all the facts out there. Thank you in advance... (*hug*)
Hey! I came out to some of my friends before I came out to my family. I think this helps you build some support and enables you to be who you are around some of The important people in your life. With this support you may build more confidence to tell your parents or it will at least help you to wait the three years if you choose to.
I think you should tell your friends if you are comfortable with it. They could give you support if you decide to wait to tell your parents. You are 15 years old though so if you decide to tell your parents you may be risking being thrown out of the streets if they blow up on you. Hoping that wouldn't happen though to you. At the end of the day it is about doing what is best for you. Hope it all works out for you though. (*hug*)
