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would i be wrong to come out over facebook profile change?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by bmayne, May 10, 2014.

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  1. bmayne

    bmayne
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    heres my story,
    im a 21 year old gay, in the military, far away from home and my boyfriend who i love and want to be with for a very long time. ive known him for about 6 months and dating for about 3. i just came out to myself about a year ago, and my sister over the phone about 3 months ago, we havent talked about it really. ever since then, i lost the want, the motivation, to come out. i dont know why, i think i still want to come out, but im having a hard time.

    would it be ok to just change my facebook and put myself as in a relationship with my boyfriend? and then make it so it wont show on the news feed. basically so if someone sees my profile they will see that im in a relationship with another guy, but it wont show up as a post. so that way nobody comments on it, they have to come talk to me. i have a hard time going up to someone, or calling them and just telling them im gay, i feel like this way would be a lot easier.

    and some people are like no no no you have to do it in person, or at least over the phone. says who? why cant i just do it like this? is it that wrong?
     
    #1 bmayne, May 10, 2014
  2. BookDragon

    BookDragon
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    Hell no it isn't wrong.

    Nobody DESERVES to be told. People don't make an effort to tell their friends and family they are straight and you are not under ANY pressure to do so just because you aren't.

    There are plenty of reasons to come out to people, but you absolutely CATEGORICALLY do not have an obligation to do so in any way shape or form. If you want to change your facebook relationship status then do it, absolutely.
     
    #2 BookDragon, May 11, 2014
  3. mbanema

    mbanema
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    While it's probably not the method I'd want to use to come out (which is probably never going to happen anyways), there's absolutely nothing wrong with it if that's how you want to do it. Coming out is 100% your decision and as far as I'm concerned whatever way will actually get you to do it is the best way.
     
    #3 mbanema, May 11, 2014
  4. Quem

    Quem
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    It's not wrong at all, in fact, I think it's very brave to do such thing! I've seen a few of my friend doing it that way too, and they got a lot of support. :icon_bigg

    I wish you good luck! :icon_bigg
     
    #4 Quem, May 11, 2014
  5. GayNerd

    GayNerd
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    It's how I came out, even though about 55 people knew already.
    It was good, and all my friends supported me.
    If your friends are true friends, they will be okay with it.

    If it seems like a good choice for you, then go for it. :slight_smile:
     
    #5 GayNerd, May 11, 2014
  6. Mirko

    Mirko
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    Hi there! As others have said, it is totally fine to do so. It all comes down to whether you feel comfortable doing so. By being open that you are having a boyfriend, you are coming out as well (at least to the people who see it on your profile). If you feel you would like to have it included on your profile, then go for it. :slight_smile:
     
    #6 Mirko, May 11, 2014
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