So over a year ago i finally came out to my parents. But all i've gotten from my mom is her making fun off and on for no provocation. She seems unwilling to even speak about it. My dad on the other seems to think we've never even talked about it. On vacation last week he was giving dating advice on girls and how to treat them right. There was no humor in hsi voice he was being completely serious as if he had blocked it out or compeltely forgotten. I'm getting more desperate and upset as the days go by, even if it does come to me leaving my parents forever. That's still two years off from this point, i feel trapped and lost and i really need help on how to get them to at least talk with me (i kinda feel awkward talking about it, just because they disapprove) I'm losing it, i really need help from someone, i need to make this situation at least bearable. (My only relationship was ruined because of my parents) Help?:bang:
Your parents appear to have set up camp along De Nile. I'm guessing they feel if they just act like you're straight, you'll just "grow out of it". Do your best to keep a level head through it all. Try to remain calm and factual about everything when you discuss things. So when your father gives you dating advice on girls, just think about it, and say "Hm. I guess most of this stuff will work on guys, too." If your mother starts giving you grief, just smile a bit and say, "That's right, Mom - still gay." And try to change the subject - it's no use arguing the point. Hopefully, they'll eventually get the idea. Lex
Hey, don't worry. Seems like your parents are in that stage of denial, and even though you've told them, they are lying to themselves. It'll take time before that stage of the coming out process resolves. Many parents seem to feel threatened and uneasy when finding out their child is gay, not always because of social standing, but many times because they idea that homosexuality is evil is so ingrained into them that they feel that they are at fault for something bad. Just give them some time, and I know it's hard, but there are various resources here and people with great connections(Like Becky!<3) that you can talk to. I wish you the best of luck, and know that your not alone in these ordeals. Just keep your head high and goals pure.
Have you tried giving them some PFLAG materials? You might have to drive in the big truck and move them away from the "river of De Nile".
Lex already said it, they're in denial. You can never force your parents to wake up and smell reality, but you can drop them reminders. When your mom teases you, you can gently remind her that you're gay. If she persists, just tell her to stop, and that she's making you uncomfortable. That she should understand. Next time your dad tries to talk to you about girls, just kinda slip it in there: "but I'm not attracted to girls..." They may never come around, so try not to get upset about it. If they're going to deny your orientation, you shouldn't get all worked up over there inability to accept you.
I'm in the same boat as you. I also came out over to my parents over a year ago and lately they've been asking me if I have met any girls. The only thing left for me to do is to remind them of the talks and the PFLAG material that I gave them last year. Perhaps you should do the same and remind your parents of what happened last year as well. Hope this helps. Best of luck to you.
Aw, sorry to hear that. It's hard when you don't receive support from your own family. Maybe you can bring up PFLAG? I guess you're too old to apply for IMSA, huh? It's only 2 more years though until college. They'll go by pretty fast.
Mmmm, that is my dad 100%, with the exception I'm really out and proud. He's even ok with me sleeping with guys, but he also thinks I can just flip a switch and have sex with a girl.
Dude... I can soo relate. I came out to my parents a year ago (today actually, but dont ask me why I remember that). Anyway, my dad totally ignored the fact that I am gay. The only time he brought it up was when a newspaper quoted me as being pro gay marriage, and he said that I should keep my mouth shut, or else people might find out (like it isnt obvious enough). And my mom is in complete denial as well. Well... I can say two things. One, try a family therapist. If your parents are willing to go to one, it might make them understand you and where you are coming from. Also, if you wanna talk, I feel like we are in similar boats. Feel free to PM me.
Yeah same story the night I told them they were supportive and weren't angry at all then like a couple of weeks later had another talk about it same they were supportive but after then nothing whatsover and acted like nothing happened
I can't riltnsay much because everyone above me has it covered by just try to tell em straight up hey I'm gay an that's not gunna change haha that mite be a lil to straight up tho LOL good luck
