I'm hairy *cries*

Fred!!
Chill out man.

I know you liked this guy, but first ask yourself several things.

a) how long have you liked this guy?
b) how much does his opinion matter to you in the general scheme of things IF you aren't going out?
c) Is letting this comment get to you really worth it?

You've come really far and I know you've been working hard with your therapist.
Don't let one guy drag you down when you're doing so well! Be defiant! You are YOU and if he doesn't like it, TOUGH COOKIES FOR HIM!!!! You are nice, you are funny, you are smart, you are UNIQUE and if he can't cope with a bit of hair well he's obviously not your type!!

Tell him to grow up and that whatever flaws or "turnoff's" he has are things you over look, and that he should do the same if he wants to even consider going out with someone as awesome as you.

 

Fred -- I'm sorry to hear you feel that way about yourself. If he can't accept you for who you are maybe you should just forget about him. As for yourself, since you obviously don't like being hairy -- get rid of it! Lol. Hair is something that can easily be removed. That's the only other option. If shaving doesn't work out, maybe you should consider waxing. Don't feel down about it, you can't control something like that, it's just your genetic makeup. I hope this helps some. (*hug*)

 

aww im sorry. theres nothing wrong with being hairy... i mean im hairy too i guess haha

 

Fred, I have three points to cover:

1. Recognize this for what it is. Things aren't working out with one guy. If hair really is such a big turn-off for him I suspect that either (a) he is rather petty, and probably not worthy of you or (b) hair is such a turn-off for him that it would not have worked out. For reasons explained later in point 3, I suspect (a) to be the case.

To put some cold numbers to this situation the population of Uruguay is estimated at 3.48 million. With a global average of 5% being gay and the (conservative) gay gender balance at 50/50 that leaves 87 000 minus the few that you mentioned. So while this situation may suck a lot and it is okay to feel sad, don't let this be the end of the world for you.

2. Hair is okay. While the media may portray it as undesirable or reserved to smaller factions as the bears or hair fetishists, the large number of hairy guys that end up in successful relationships suggests at the very least that it is tolerable if not desirable by a significant portion of the population. Perhaps you are having bad luck, or maybe you are looking in the wrong places, but they are out there for beauty remains the domain of the beholder.

3. When two guys are really into each other, the mind takes over and they become more beautiful in each other's eyes. This is quite clear with older married couples who are not beautiful but to each other, and for them that is all they need. You may have noticed some of your own crushes look a bit better, and come across as a bit smarter then they actually are - the mind does this all free of charge because it is (or should be at least) for someone special.

To sum it up, it is okay to feel sad, but do keep perspective. When you are ready to go out again looking for another guy remember that the pool is still fairly large, and that somewhere there is bound to be a guy (or more) who will value you for who and what you are.

 

Pish posh, if that's the reasoning for him to reject you, who needs him? Besides, if that's his only concern about you, then you're doing good in all other areas! Someone's gotta be bound to pick you up on your positive traits. ^^ Perhaps even someone with a liking for hairy guys.

We could all be a little better-looking.

Do we need to be? Nahh..

 

Fred, he just sounds like someone who lets trivial things get to him.
Hair on someone's body :O thats mega hot!!!!!
i find it a complete turn on, but if i found someone smooth top to toe, i wouldnt run for the hills.
it sounds to me like he let something so minor get between an awesome relationship.
Dont worry about it dude, his loss!!! go find yourself a hair loving hottie and show him down!

 

I'm the hairiest guy I know. Actually, a few years ago, a friend said, "Lex is the only person I know who could go to a furry convention without a costume." Since then, I've just started saying I'm furry - it sounds nicer. I've had a couple guys tell me they were totally turned off by it. That's fine - the fact that they'd skip over me due to my bodyhair meant, to me, that they weren't worth pursuing.

Lex

 

Lex, you always know what i'm thinking. i totally agree. dont worry, everybody has different tastes... there must be things that you find offputting right?

besides, i like furry guys :icon_wink

 

If he doesn't want you over something as trivial as that, he isn't worth having you! I may not be here long but from what I have seen, you are kind, intelligent, outgoing, brave, confident and much more. All of those things matter more to me than how smooth or hairy you are. You will find someone who agrees with that.

 

That guy is incredibly shallow! You're getting on well, chatting, shared interests etc. And he throws all that away because of some physical aspect he doesn't like. What a jerk!

Fred, you're too good for him. You need someone who likes you as you and doesn't make his decisions based on some physical characteristic.

 

Have you changed your avatar because of this? aha

Don't get chewed up over this.
If he's that shallow its best that your not with him.



(Cutest monkey ever?)

 

tbh if any guy doesnt want to go out with you for something so trivial he isnt worth going for..

if it is something that really does bother you have you looked into laser hair removal?

and completely off topic: i LOVE your accent (gotta love youtube )

 

The guy really isnt worth it! I am also the hariest person i know, and have always been so ashamed of it! but if it is really concerning u then there are things that can be done. I actually get most of it waxed or clippered quite short. It has also boosted by confindence when wearing things like sleevless t-shirts and when going on hols.

 

Try not to dwell on these things for too long. You can never change the way you are, so don't feel bad when you're rejected for it. If they can't accept you for who you are, then you're NOT compatible. Love should never be restricted by a person's body type or appearance, and if he couldn't see past that, then you probably wouldn't have been happy with him. True love transcends the physical.
If that doesn't work for you, you could get a full body wax once a month. That's a painful and expensive alternative to true happiness though. Don't recommend that one.

 

Fred, don't be foolish. You are very handsome!
Excessive hair may not be aesthetically pleasing to some or more importantly may present self-esteem issues for you. If hair presents such a heavy problem for you their are permanent options available.


That being said, i wouldn't pay any attention to removing what comes natural to you.
Rather i would focus on finding someone that loves you as you are.

This guy sounds quite shallow and vain to let something like this stand in the way.
In my opinion he was not good enough for you.
Just remember a person is more than the sum of their parts.

 

I don't know if I would call the guy shallow... It is just a preference. I prefer guys that have some hair, don't really care for smooth. Does that make me shallow? No. It does make you shallow if all of a sudden the conversation just dies and you guys never talk. That happened to me the other night talking to this guy I met on CL, I just shrugged it off and kept looking.

I'd say don't dwell on it. You are a cute guy and things will come around. There are plenty, and I mean plenty, of men who like hairy guys. You just got to wait till you meet them.

 

Again shallow men!!!!! YOU DON'T NEED THEM! Don't let them make you feel bad about yourself they aren't worth it. Maybe you need to find a new place to meet guys who aren't shallow. I say shallow because of the way he obviously didn't care for your feelings when he decided to let you know he doesn't like hairy men. There is someone out there for you, you just have to find him.